Timothy McSweeney's Header Image

- - - -

Just in time for Valentine's Day,
the Guardian in London has
reviewed and raved about
The Secret Language of Sleep.
And, for the rest of the week,
you can buy it for $5!

- - - -

 

R E V I E W S   O F   B A N D S
M Y   F R I E N D S   A R E   I N .

BY KEVIN GUILFOILE

- - - -


PART II: THE OFFSHOOTZ

In the early 90s, following the lead of groups like Wichita's Doe A Deer, and Jacksonville's Rhymes With P, Phil Hatcher assembled a band that fused the punk and metal posturing of his angst-ridden and sexually-tormented adolescence with Broadway showtunes from the heyday of musical theater. The result, the Insane Fosse Posse, tried to reconnect a new generation with a rich chapter of America's cultural past. "I'd like to bring the music of Rodgers and Hammerstein to a younger, hipper audience," he'd say at the start of each show, just before turning a fire hose on three cockney flower girls dancing in a steel cage. Eventually, however, label interest in the Showcore genre began to wane and, in July of '95 at Fireside Bowl, the Insane Fosse Posse played their famous encore medley, "Rock n' Roll All Night/Surrey With The Fringe On Top," for the final time.

The following summer Phil let me stay with him in Lakeview while I looked for an apartment that would take cats. By that time, he was back in the clubs with a BoDeans tribute band called Milwaukee's Best. They played to enthusiastic college crowds all over Chicago's North side, and it appeared that Phil had finally discovered a lasting niche suited to his talents. Sadly, it wasn't to be. One night, the real Sammy "BoDean" Llanas confronted Phil right before Milwaukee's Best opened their set at Empty Bottle -- The BoDeans, it seemed, had wanted that particular gig for themselves. Phil tried to explain, insisting that Milwaukee's Best was a celebration of the BoDeans' art, and that they should be flattered by the effort. Sammy replied by calling Phil an idiot and yelling, loud enough for Phil's girlfriend to hear, that the BoDeans weren't even from Milwaukee -- they were from Waukesha. Too embarrassed to continue, Phil fled through the alley exit, and he broke up the band the next day. Sammy must have felt bad about it later, because he wrote Phil a letter to apologize. He even suggested that Milwaukee's Best would be a good name for a Violent Femmes tribute band. I thought that was a pretty good idea, and I said so, but Phil was just sort of soured on the whole thing.

Now Phil's put together an Offspring tribute called the Offshootz. He doesn't expect to have the same trouble this time because, while the Offspring are very popular, they aren't local. One problem Phil does have is that he hasn't been able to find all of the Offspring's older CDs. Right now, he has only the newest one, so the sets tend to be kind of short. Phil tries to get around this by playing "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)" six times each show; he does an acoustic version and a Esperanto version and he also does it like the BoDeans. During a memorable performance at the U.S. Beer Company last month, the Offshootz played "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)" nine times in a row and "Why Don't You Get a Job?" four times. Recently, Phil's been on the phone trying to put together a gig sponsored by Q101, a local radio station which, just last Tuesday, played "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)" 37 times between noon and 7 p.m.

Phil went to see the real Offspring a few weeks ago at the New World Music Theater and they did a few of their old tunes. At rehearsal the next day, Phil tried to play them on his guitar, but he couldn't remember all the words. He's really mad at himself for not bringing a piece of paper to the concert so, if you see him, don't bring it up. Also, don't ask, "How come nobody else in the band wanted to go to the concert with you, even though you offered to give everyone a ride?" He'd never come right out and say that he questions their commitment, but you can read between the lines.

With any luck, the Offshootz will stay together long enough for the Offspring to release their next CD. If they break up before then, fans of tribute rock will feel the loss, and not a few of them will wonder, given more songs, what the Offshootz might have been.

 

 

OTHER McSWEENEY'S STORIES:
- - - -


Police Report, Western Wisconsin By Jeff Johnson
The 1999 Zagat Survey of My Friends By Eric McHenry
Maxwell's Lyrics, Or Maxwell's Equations? By Michael Genrich
Greek Lineup By Mike Topp
Sixteen Punchlines for Hot Days By Jason Ross

- - - -

MAIN PAGE | ARCHIVES



Memories of Amanda Davis




Red dot denotes content that is new today.

Black dot denotes newish content.

McSWEENEY'S STORE

SUBSCRIBE TO:
McSWEENEY'S
THE BELIEVER
WHOLPHIN

FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS

THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD

INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE

THE BEST AMERICAN NONREQUIRED READING

McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST

BOOKSTORES WITH A McSWEENEY'S DISPLAY

McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES

ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES:
FOR BOOKS
FOR THE QUARTERLY
FOR THE WEBSITE
FOR WHOLPHIN

McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS

CONTACT US

- - - -

LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S

LISTS

McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS

REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD

NEW WHOLPHIN FILM

TEDDY WAYNE'S UNPOPULAR PROVERBS

NON-ESSENTIAL MNEMONICS

BITCHSLAP: A COLUMN ABOUT WOMEN AND FIGHTING

DISPATCHES FROM A GUY TRYING UNSUCCESSFULLY
TO SELL A SONG IN NASHVILLE


GLOBAL WAR ON BEDBUGS: LETTERS FROM BEDBUG CITY

THE CONFLICTED EXISTENCE OF A FEMALE PORN WRITER

OH MY GAWD: A COLUMN ABOUT A TEENAGER NAVIGATING RELIGION

DISPATCHES FROM MANILA

DISPATCHES FROM AN INDIAN CASINO

THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST

CHRIS WHITE ANSWERS PROFOUND
QUESTIONS ABOUT THE PRESIDENTS


REPORTS FROM THE PINBALL SCENE

LETTERS FROM THE HELLBOX

NOTES FROM AN AMATEUR SPECTATOR
AT AMATEUR MIXED MARTIAL ARTS FIGHTS


B.R. COHEN'S DAYS AT THE MUSEUM

CONVERSATIONS AT A WARTIME CAFÉ

GRANT MUNROE'S CORPORATE FOLKTALES

SARAH WALKER SHOWS YOU HOW

DISPATCHES FROM AN ENVIRONMENTAL LAWYER
WHO IS TRYING TO GROW A MUSTACHE


DISPATCHES FROM A HANGDOG BANKRUPT

DISPATCHES FROM THE CAPITAL

DISPATCHES FROM INDIA

THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL

SEAN MICHAELS LISTENS TO MUSIC IN MONTREAL

SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES

STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE

YOUR MONEY, YOUR JOB ... YOUR LIFE, WITH ALISON ROSEN

KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE

LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL
TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY


E-MAILS SENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
FLAG-FOOTBALL TEAM


TRAVELING EUROPE IN STYLE WITH AUCKLAND DINGIROO,
DARK-AGE TOURIST AND CRITIC OF FOOD AND DRINK


JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES

INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS

FLIP: A COLUMN ABOUT SKATEBOARDING

OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND

BEN GREENMAN'S FAKE CELBRITY MUSICALS

DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN

EXCERPTS FROM THE PANORAMA

SOLUTIONS TO BENJAMIN TAUSIG'S
THREE-DEMENSIONAL CROSSWORD PUZZLE
IN THE SAN FRANCISCO PANORAMA


ABOUT A VERY BAD WIZARD

ABOUT THE WILD THINGS

ABOUT THE CONVALESCENT

ABOUT FEVER CHART

ABOUT GOD SAYS NO

ABOUT ZEITOUN

- - - -

ADDITIONAL MATERIAL