The deadline for the 2008 Amanda Davis Highwire Fiction Award, a $2,500 grant given to a woman writer of 32 years or younger, is this Thursday, May 15. For more information, click here. - - - -

B A D   N A M E S F O R P R O F E S S I O N A L   W R E S T L E R S . BY JEFF JOHNSON - - - - Linus The Spiller Lace The Soup-Eater Stilts The Tailor Mitochondria Kimono Boy The Really Tiny Moth The Bulimic Cheerleader Winston Churchill Vasco de Gama, Jr. Tickles The Fig Wasp Cookies -n- Creme (tag team duo) The Healer El Wusso The Precocious Feline The Professor Balsamic Vinegar The Stooge Diabetes Warren G. Harding The Wilting Zinnia The School Boy The Yearling The Pediatrician The Old Coward Naomi The Narcoleptic Magic Realism More Bad Names for Professional Wrestlers (added 1:34 pm Wednesday) The Vegan The Lonely Marine Grace Kelly Peter Billingsley Swimmer's Itch The Orderly Smarty Pants Babette Jivamukti Paul McCartney The Shlub The Shrill Housewife The Truant Officer The Dartmouth Grad Student The Keokuk Optometrist The Whispering Mime Aaron Copeland The Impressionist The Phonics Expert Nancy Walker Hospice Boy Noel Coward Frondeur The Demimonde The Victim The Tattletale Truffle Victor Kiam The Poet Laureate Mrs. Grundy Burt Hooton The Pawn Dale The Little Ragu Morrissey     OTHER McSWEENEY'S STORIES: - - - - I Haven't Seen Gergen in a Couple of Weeks By Steve Featherstone Easy Halloween Costume Ideas By Tim Carvell Ponce de Leon and the Fountain of Youth By Christopher Orlet Appropriate Names for Pets By Chadd S. Johnson One-Time Deals By Ben Greenman

- - - - MAIN PAGE   |   ARCHIVES   Memories of Amanda Davis   Red dot denotes content that is new today. Black dot denotes newish content. McSWEENEY'S STORE SUBSCRIBE TO: McSWEENEY'S THE BELIEVER WHOLPHIN FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES SUBMISSION GUIDELINES: FOR BOOKS FOR THE QUARTERLY FOR THE WEBSITE FOR WHOLPHIN McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS CONTACT US - - - - LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S LISTS McSWEENEY'S PREDICTS McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS NEW WHOLPHIN FILM DAN LIEBERT, VERBAL CARTOONIST JOKES BY BRIAN BEATTY REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD DISPATCHES FROM MOSCOW SO YOU WANT TO BE PRESIDENT? DISPATCHES FROM THE ANACOSTIA THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL BEN GREENMAN'S FAKE CELEBRITY MUSICALS DISPATCHES FROM A HUMANITARIAN JOURNALIST DISPATCHES FROM IRAQ SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES PHILIP GRAHAM SPENDS A YEAR IN LISBON STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE DISPATCHES FROM THE NAPOLEONIC WARS AT THE MET KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE LAWRENCE WESCHLER'S EVERYTHING THAT RISES: A BOOK OF CONVERGENCES THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST ABOUT WHAT IS THE WHAT ABOUT BOWL OF CHERRIES ABOUT COMEDY BY THE NUMBERS ABOUT JOHN BRANDON'S ARKANSAS LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY DISPATCHES FROM ADJUNCT FACULTY AT A LARGE STATE UNIVERSITY ADVICE FROM A PERSON WITH A BACHELOR'S DEGREE IN PSYCHOLOGY DISPATCHES FROM THE NBA ENTERTAINMENT LEAGUE JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES B.R. COHEN'S ANNALS OF SCIENCE INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN MICHAEL IAN BLACK IS A VERY FAMOUS CELEBRITY DISPATCHES FROM ROY KESEY, AN AMERICAN GUY MARRIED TO A PERUVIAN DIPLOMAT LIVING IN CHINA STEPHEN ELLIOTT'S POKER REPORT - - - - ADDITIONAL MATERIAL