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Guy from Channel Five: Hi, Jim? Jim Barach, from channel five. Guy from Channel Nine: Oh, hi, how are you? [Jim Teske (Ch. 9) and Jim Barach (Ch. 5) shake hands, while I stand between them.] Five: Not bad, not bad. How are things with you? Nine: Things are pretty quiet today. Pretty quiet. Today's my day off. Five: Hey, I know how that goes. ... Five: I'm heading in now. I just got a call that there was a fire at Unisys. Now they're having trouble downloading any new satellite images. I don't know quite what to expect when I go in. ... Nine: So, you getting ready for your first winter? Five: [chuckling, heh heh] Well, I was here for half of last year, but it's going to be different. Nine: Different from Florida. Five: You're right about that. But I did three or four years in Kansas before that, so I know how it can get. I know about the cold but not so much the snow. It'll be different. ... Five: Jim, does your dad own a clothing store? Nine: Yeah, uh, it's over on-- Five: That's what I thought! I thought your dad owned a clothing store. I've been in there. I've seen him. Nine: Really? He never mentioned it to me. He knows everyone who comes in and out there and he's always telling me who came in. Five: Well, I was new in town. Nine: Oh. ... Five: Jim, have you been on your new set yet? Nine: Yes, I have. Yesterday. It's nice. They did a good job with it. Five: It looks nice. We got a new set too. I like how ours looks. Nine: The lighting's good. They've done a good job with the lighting. They've got us backlit better so we stand out more. Five: Right. ... Five: So what's with Eichorn [Dave Eichorn, the senior-most
meteorologist
at Channel Nine]? Doesn't he stick around when Mondays go late?
Nine: He wants some time with his family. His son is five-years-old now. We won't be doing that during sweeps. Five: [chuckling knowingly, heh heh ha] Nine: Just wanted to be home early in the evenings a little bit. Five: Well, you tell him I said he's a weanie. Nine: What? Oh, okay. Five: You can tell him I said he's a big weanie. Nine: Right, okay.
OTHER McSWEENEY'S STORIES:
Losers' Auction By Lawrence Douglas & Alexander George On This Day in History By Jason Adams Glamorous By Sylvie Callahan Ten Consecutive Corners By Ben Greenman A House for Dee Dee By Christina Nunez |