Through this Friday, all available back issues of Wholphin are half off—10 bucks apiece for countless warm evenings of rare films, featuring Miranda July, Paul Rudd, Donald Trump, and a monkey-faced eel. - - - - |
[Think of it: Short, humorous pieces, inspired by specific, dated news items. What happens to such pieces, should this publication, or one of its johnny-come-hither counterparts, fail to run them in time for them to retain their relevance, their topicality, their torn-from-today's-headlines-ness? You can probably guess their fate: They are, in the vernacular, "killed." But this, Untimely Week, is their chance to live. It is appropriate for Untimely Week to begin on a Tuesday. Enjoy Untimely Week.] - - - - AUTHOR'S NOTE: What follows should probably be titled "Happier Hairless? Revisited" or simply "Happier Hairless Revisited." Either way. Because it was written last year is the thing. And I'm revisiting it now, briefly, in order to write this. Edisto Revisited is a very good novel by Padgett Powell, though perhaps not quite as good as Edisto, the great novel by Padgett Powell. When I take a moment to sit here and pretend as if I'm reflecting back on last year's U.S. Open, it occurs to me that 1999 was a far more innocent time. Back then the country—or the fraction of the country that watches professional tennis—could be captivated and intrigued by the bold decision of one of the sport's stars to shave his body as closely as his head. It occurs to me that I haven't actually read Edisto. Still, I have heard many good things about it, all from people I typically trust, or people I at least will listen to when it comes to books of fiction, or at least books of fiction written by Americans sometime in the last twenty years or so. As many of you no doubt already know, at this year's Open Andre Agassi, earlier identified only as the athlete who shaved his body as closely as his head, is leading no merry parade. This is an occasion for sadness and a time to remember 1999, I think, right? Yes. When today there is no more merry parade? Edisto Revisited could be every bit as good as Edisto, I just don't know. Does everyone remember 1999? I should read Edisto. Cherish the memories.- - - - "When he arrives on the grounds of the National Tennis Center, Agassi leads a merry parade to the practice courts and sheds his shirt, unveiling a chest that is every bit as bare as his shaved head. "'I just got tired of being hairy,' he explained. "The crowd loves it."
—Hal Bock, AP Sports Writer, 8/99
OTHER McSWEENEY'S STORIES:
Ask A Former Professional Literary Agent By John Hodgman I Write Short Books About the Popular Bands of the Day. Here Is My Story. By Catherine Zymet A Brief Autobiography of Camille Paglia, as Told through Introductory Appositive Phrases In Her Online Column By Lisa Whipple Philadelphia: Into the Maw By Neal Pollack Decoding the Official Soundtrack of the Democratic National Convention By Brad Kloza |
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