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Now available for preorder:
The San Francisco Panorama.
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CAN YOU FIX THIS? "Can you fix this?" I asked the handyman, pointing at the stalactites in my ceiling. "No, he said. - - - - DID YOU KNOW? I saw on a nature show how this cat's urine glows under a black light. I thought I was the only one with that power. - - - - SHRIMP When I read that a shrimp's heart is in its head, I thought, we humans are like that: we have a slender elongated body, compressed abdomen, and a long spiny rostrum. - - - - SNEEZE If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die. If you keep your eyes on the sidewalk, you will occasionally find a quarter, sometimes a dollar. - - - - ALL AND SOME Any man, in the right situation, is capable of being a great lover. But not every man can say, "The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick." In conclusion, great lovers and tongue twisters are not as similar as you might think. - - - - AUTHOR'S NOTE I am an authority on vampires.
OTHER McSWEENEY'S STORIES:
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