Timothy McSweeney's Header Image

- - - -

Now available for preorder:
The San Francisco Panorama
.

- - - -

P A U L   C O L L I N S   W E E K :
E X C E R P T   N O .   T W O
F R O M   G E O F F R E Y   P Y K E ' S
T O   R U H L E B E N
—   A N D   B A C K
,
A   N E W   T I T L E
F R O M   T H E
C O L L I N S   L I B R A R Y.


EDITED BY PAUL COLLINS


- - - -

[Paul Collins is founder and editor of The Collins Library, a project dedicated to the reprinting of unusual, out-of-print literary works. The most recent title, To Ruhleben — And Back, follows the adventures of Geoffrey Pyke, who, as a teenager in 1914, convinced a London newspaper editor to let him travel to Germany as a war correspondent. Captured by German troops, Pyke was imprisoned at Ruhleben, a German internment camp, from which he eventually escaped, making his way home to write this travelogue at the age of twenty.]

[Paul Collins is currently on tour in support of his memoir, Sixpence House, which recounts his time spent living in the Welsh town of Hay-on-Wye, known as the "Town of Books."]

- - - -

[Read an excerpt from To Ruhleben — And Back, an excerpt from Sixpence House, and parts one and two of an interview with Paul Collins.]

- - - -

Modern sentry-going, as the reader probably knows, does not follow the old system in its entirety. With the possible exception of one cordon, the guards do not walk up and down, but stand perfectly still, their bayonets ready, listening. This I surmised would be the case here. I had evolved, during the course of two months, two especial methods of crawling, one which I called the crab-crawl, by which one could proceed in one direction, and yet keep one's eyes fixed on a sentry in any other. The second method, which I dubbed the caterpillar method, had sheer speed, combined with a modicum of invisibility, for its purpose, and depended on lifting the knee at a certain point in the movement. I had practised these openly in sight of the whole camp, and had said they were part of a system for the curing of weak heart of a Dr. Sörgersund, a Dane, whom I invented.

Following the first method, we moved off very slowly, our boots hanging from our mouths. It will be a long time before I forget the precise taste of boot blacking. I know that as we went slowly on, the boot would sometimes drag against something on the ground, and I would feel that the blacking was getting mixed with the sweat which was streaming down my face. It was vitally important that we should arrive clean, for I had heard of a Russian officer who after escaping had been caught, merely because he appeared somewhat dishevelled. Suddenly I saw a light. "The little man with the dog," I whispered. "Run!" We risked the fifteen extra sentries and, changing quickly to the caterpillar method, simply raced on hands and knees as fast as we could go.

It was a false alarm. We spent close on two hours crawling about two hundred yards. We had purposely described a large semicircle, and had now arrived in line with the race-course. Near here we knew there was the road we were aiming at. As we were about to get up on our feet a huge fence of wire-netting surmounted by the usual barbed wire arose out of the darkness. For five minutes we lay perfectly flat, not even whispering, both waiting to see if it was guarded by a sentry. Then we got up, and my friend climbed on to my back, and, putting his feet into the interstices of the wire, climbed over. The agony of listening to the noise he made, and his pitiable appeals to me, when my turn came, not to rattle the wire so frightfully, is one of those hundred incidents that can be left to the imagination.

Now we moved along fast, almost at a run, for the sentry, if there was one, was now behind us, and, though we were showing up dangerously against the sky-line, we stood a fair chance if he tried to shoot us through the fence. We had hardly got out of earshot when we found ourselves opposite another fence, the biggest we had yet come across. It was something worse than tall. Instead of having the barbed wire on the top of the poles, the former was carried on brackets that leant backwards at an angle of forty-five degrees. As I was the taller, my friend got on to my back, and, with a great deal of difficulty, got over, and dropped softly to the other side. It was then my turn. I pulled myself to the top, but could not get my leg over the barbed wire. I had to let go.

 

 

OTHER McSWEENEY'S STORIES:
- - - -


Paul Collins Week: "I Wouldn't Want to Wipe Out in a Spectacular Manner": An Interview with Paul Collins, on History and Recovering Lost Books, Part Two By Tom Thornhill
Paul Collins Week: "I Wouldn't Want to Wipe Out in a Spectacular Manner": An Interview with Paul Collins, on History and Recovering Lost Books, Part One By Tom Thornhill
Paul Collins Week: In Ruins (an Excerpt from Sixpence House) By Paul Collins
Paul Collins Week: Excerpt from Geoffrey Pyke's To Ruhleben — And Back, a New Title from the Collins Library Edited by Paul Collins
Unused Audio Commentary By Howard Zinn & Noam Chomsky, Recorded Summer, 2002, for The Fellowship of the Ring (Platinum Series Extended Edition) DVD, Part Two By Jeff Alexander and Tom Bissell

- - - -

MAIN PAGE | ARCHIVES



Memories of Amanda Davis




Red dot denotes content that is new today.

Black dot denotes newish content.

McSWEENEY'S STORE

SUBSCRIBE TO:
McSWEENEY'S
THE BELIEVER
WHOLPHIN

FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS

THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD

INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE

THE BEST AMERICAN NONREQUIRED READING

McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST

BOOKSTORES WITH A McSWEENEY'S DISPLAY

McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES

ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES:
FOR BOOKS
FOR THE QUARTERLY
FOR THE WEBSITE
FOR WHOLPHIN

McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS

CONTACT US

- - - -

LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S

LISTS

McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS

REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD

NEW WHOLPHIN FILM

DAN LIEBERT, VERBAL CARTOONIST

TEDDY WAYNE'S UNPOPULAR PROVERBS

NON-ESSENTIAL MNEMONICS

BITCHSLAP: A COLUMN ABOUT WOMEN AND FIGHTING

DISPATCHES FROM A GUY TRYING UNSUCCESSFULLY
TO SELL A SONG IN NASHVILLE


GLOBAL WAR ON BEDBUGS: LETTERS FROM BEDBUG CITY

THE CONFLICTED EXISTENCE OF A FEMALE PORN WRITER

OH MY GAWD: A COLUMN ABOUT A TEENAGER NAVIGATING RELIGION

DISPATCHES FROM MANILA

DISPATCHES FROM AN INDIAN CASINO

THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST

CHRIS WHITE ANSWERS PROFOUND
QUESTIONS ABOUT THE PRESIDENTS


REPORTS FROM THE PINBALL SCENE

LETTERS FROM THE HELLBOX

NOTES FROM AN AMATEUR SPECTATOR
AT AMATEUR MIXED MARTIAL ARTS FIGHTS


B.R. COHEN'S DAYS AT THE MUSEUM

CONVERSATIONS AT A WARTIME CAFÉ

AND HERE'S THE KICKER:
MIKE SACKS'S CONVERSATIONS WITH HUMOR WRITERS


GRANT MUNROE'S CORPORATE FOLKTALES

SARAH WALKER SHOWS YOU HOW

DISPATCHES FROM AN ENVIRONMENTAL LAWYER
WHO IS TRYING TO GROW A MUSTACHE


DISPATCHES FROM A HANGDOG BANKRUPT

DISPATCHES FROM THE CAPITAL

DISPATCHES FROM INDIA

THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL

SEAN MICHAELS LISTENS TO MUSIC IN MONTREAL

SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES

KIDS' LETTERS TO PRESIDENT OBAMA

STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE

YOUR MONEY, YOUR JOB ... YOUR LIFE, WITH ALISON ROSEN

KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE

ABOUT THE WILD THINGS

ABOUT THE CONVALESCENT

ABOUT FEVER CHART

ABOUT GOD SAYS NO

ABOUT ZEITOUN

LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL
TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY


E-MAILS SENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA ENGLISH DEPARTMENT
FLAG-FOOTBALL TEAM


TRAVELING EUROPE IN STYLE WITH AUCKLAND DINGIROO,
DARK-AGE TOURIST AND CRITIC OF FOOD AND DRINK


JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES

INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS

FLIP: A COLUMN ABOUT SKATEBOARDING

OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND

DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN

MICHAEL IAN BLACK IS A VERY FAMOUS CELEBRITY

DAN KENNEDY SOLVES YOUR PROBLEMS WITH PAPER

STEPHEN ELLIOTT'S POKER REPORT

- - - -

ADDITIONAL MATERIAL