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M O V I E S D I R E C T E D B Y
M E L G I B S O N ' S F A T H E R ,
H U T T O N G I B S O N
BY LAURENCE HUGHES
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Schindler's Laundry List
A German industrialist struggles to keep his dry cleaning from falling into Nazi hands, but doesn't fret about his Jewish employees because there is no Holocaust.
Don't Shoot the Pianist
A gifted young musician in Warsaw becomes a celebrated concert pianist. Fortunately his career is not interrupted by a Holocaust.
Long Life is Beautiful
A silly Italian waiter woos and wins a beautiful girl, and they have a son. The waiter proves to be a devoted husband and father. He proudly watches his son grow to manhood, then enjoys the blessings of grandchildren. They cherish every moment of their lives together because there is no Holocaust to prevent them from doing so.
The Diaries of Anne Frank
A woman records every intimate detail of her long, productive life in a personal journal, which runs to several volumes. Her account begins when she is a young girl in Amsterdam, where, by virtue of the fact that there is no Holocaust, she and her family live in spacious, comfortable surroundings. She falls in love, marries, becomes a successful writer, raises several children, and dies peacefully in her sleep at the age of 102.
Poor Judgment at Nuremberg
A war crimes tribunal convenes in Germany, but since there has been no Holocaust there is nothing for them to do. Court is adjourned and everyone goes to lunch.
Holocaust
"Nazis," the evil Master Race, attempt to annihilate "Jews" and other beings they deem "undesirable," in this wildly imaginative science fiction-fantasy tale set in a bizarre alternate universe.
OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES:
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Open Letters to People or Entities Who Are Unlikely to Respond
20-Minute Stories Contest Honorable Mention
Phabulous List Friday
An Interview with the Repo Man By Suzanne Yeagley
McSweeney's Brain Exploder Edited By Carlton Doby
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