THIS FRIDAY WILL BE LIKE OTHER FRIDAYS, WITH SOME LISTS. - - - - MOST COMMON RECURRING DREAMS OF THE CICADA. By Tracy Moller Digging and digging to surface, but never emerging Mating with one's own mother Being eaten by dog or other yard animal Never-ending fall from tree as a nymph Stuck in shell midmolt Emerge from ground, only to realize that it's not the right year Not knowing the song Being chased by lawn mower Slowly drowning in swimming-pool skimmer basket Being captured and placed in mayonnaise jar with handful of torn grass, twig, and cup of water Being captured and placed in same jar as above, only without air holes punched in jar lid Uncomfortable extended existential conversation with one's own shell Late for spawn—all the hot cicadas are taken Mandibles loose and/or falling off and, most common: That one where you're flying - - - - SONGS THAT WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN HITS IF THEY'D BEEN GRAMMATICALLY CORRECT. By Karen Wise Lie, Lady, Lie I Have Eyes for Only You I Must Be Myself* Whom Do You Love? (There) Isn't Any Sunshine When She's Gone (There) Isn't Any Mountain High Enough Love Me Tenderly *I've Gotta Be Me - - - - MUSICAL STYLES THAT NEVER CAUGHT ON. By Ben Solomon Neo-Progressive Gregorian Chant Nebraskan Surf Rock Turkish Invasion Quiet Grrrl Rhythm & Shoes Rap-Hop Stalinist Acid Rock Death Funk Stubblegum Pop Glass-Eyed Soul - - - - OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES: - - - - This Friday Will Be Like Other Fridays, With Some Lists Stranger Danger: A Guide for Kids By Wendy Molyneux The Future Dictionary of America Contest Winners Summer Vacation at Burning Man By G. Xavier Robillard This Bible You Sold Me Is Clearly Defective and I'd Like to Return It, Please By Matthew Simmons

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