This Friday, July 25, is your last day to start or renew a subscription to McSweeney's and start with Issue 28. Coincidentally, it's also the last day to start or renew a subscription to Wholphin and start with Issue 6. Both subscriptions are discounted (McSweeney's by $5, Wholphin by $10). If you've moved, please send us your address changes. - - - -

Microsoft Word's 42-Sentence Autosummarization of the "Ask President Bush" Campaign Event on August 30 at Nashua High School North, in Nashua, New Hampshire. BY DAN WEAVER - - - - THE PRESIDENT: Thank you. (Applause.) (Laughter.) (Laughter.) (Applause.) (Applause.) THE PRESIDENT: Thank you. (Laughter.) (Laughter.) (Laughter.) (Applause.) (Applause.) THE PRESIDENT: That's a great question. (Applause.) (Laughter.) (Applause.) (Laughter.) (Applause.) (Applause.) (Applause.) QUESTION: Mr. President, thank you for your leadership, Mr. President. (Laughter.) (Laughter.) (Applause.) QUESTION: Mr. President, thank you. THE PRESIDENT: Fantastic. (Applause.) THE PRESIDENT: Well, thanks. (Applause.) (Applause.) QUESTION: (Inaudible.) (Applause.) QUESTION: (Inaudible.) (Applause.) (Applause.) THE PRESIDENT: Thank you. (Applause.) QUESTION: Heating and air-conditioning. THE PRESIDENT: Final question. QUESTION: God bless you, Mr. President. THE PRESIDENT: Fantastic. THE PRESIDENT: God bless you all. Thanks for coming. - - - - OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES: - - - - Microsoft Word's 42-Sentence Autosummarization of the "Ask President Bush" Campaign Event on August 30 at Nashua High School North, in Nashua, New Hampshire By Dan Weaver Guide to Determining If You Are Constantly Being Mauled by Bears By Dan Pride Phriday List Phabulousness: Alternative Rock Meets Current Events Edition Nightmare By Sean Carman An Open Letter to Officials of the United States Government Regarding What's New in My Reproductive Area By Emily Weinstein

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