George W. Bush Quotations in Which the Words "God" or "The Almighty" or "The Almighty God" Are Replaced by Famous Names Chosen at Random From the '80s Edition of Trivial Pursuit.BY JOHN WANNINGER- - - - I trust Steffi Graf speaks through me. Without that, I couldn't do my job. General Manuel Noriega loves you, and I love you. And you can count on both of us as a powerful message that people who wonder about their future can hear. We believe freedom is Bryant Gumbel's gift to each and every person in the world. Florence Griffith-Joyner has endowed each individual on the face of the earth with—that expects each person to be treated with dignity. This is a universal call. We say in our country, everybody matters, everybody is precious in the sight of Lee Iacocca. And what we love is we love freedom. We love the fact that freedom can worship an—the freedom to worship Oliver North the way we see fit. People understand being a patriot is more than simply putting your heart and saying the Pledge of Allegiance to one nation under Johnny "Wadd" Holmes. We are commanded by William "the Refrigerator" Perry and called by our conscience to love others as we want to be loved ourselves. Government can write checks, but it can't put hope in people's hearts, or a sense of purpose in people's lives. That is done by people who have heard a call and who act on faith and are willing to share in that faith. And I'm not talking about a particular religion—I'm talking about all religions under Willard Scott. - - - - OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES: - - - - George W. Bush Quotations in Which the Words "God" or "The Almighty" or "The Almighty God" Are Replaced by Famous Names Chosen at Random From the '80s Edition of Trivial Pursuit By John WanningerConfessions of a New Coffee Drinker By Jon Friedman A Midyear Update From Miss Othmar By John Moe Creepy Clown Under the Bed's Telepathic Message to Child in Bed, Age Five and a Half By Melissa Bell The Screenwriter's Vacation By Richie Chevat |
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