OLD JOKES, UPDATED TO MAKE THEM EVEN OLDER. BY MATT LOKER - - - - "What's the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball?" "The bowling ball didn't die of croup!" "Why is six afraid of seven?" "Because VII-VIII-IX!" "What's the definition of a perfect man?" "The king." "What's the definition of a perfect woman?" "That is for the king to decide." "Why did the man throw the clock out the window?" "Because he considered it a form of deviltry." "What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza?" "Three-fifths of a vote." "What do you call a blonde with two master's degrees and a Ph.D.?" "A witch." - - - - OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES: - - - - Old Jokes, Updated to Make Them Even Older By Matt Loker Issue 19, Available Now, in What Appears to Be a Cigar Box Scott McClellan's Replacement: AOL Instant Messenger Bot SmarterChild By Michael Patrick Brady Horrible Segues, With Local Anchorman Clive Rutledge By Christopher Monks Lady Macbeth on Ambien By Laurence Hughes

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