The annual Believer Visual Issue is here. Inside its pages, Norwegian "seed vault" artist Dyveke Sanne discusses her work, Sheila Heti talks with Frank Stella, and Lawrence Weschler revisits Hockney and Irwin. Also included: an 800-square-inch poster by Robyn O'Neil. - - - -

ESPN'S COLLEGE GAMEDAY ANALYZES MY RECENT SEXUAL ENCOUNTER. BY DEDE PRENO - - - - RECE DAVIS: Welcome back to Spirit Week! What a night for this young man out of the Midwest. Hubert, your thoughts on his offensive game plan? HUBERT DAVIS: Well, I thought the inside-out approach worked well. Patience isn't his best virtue, but he relaxed down the stretch and worked the clock like a champion. He had crisp passes, and his soft hands worked the ball around well. He did get into trouble during the later stages when he wasn't communicating enough, but he managed to stave off the rust and put in a real solid effort against a sizeable opponent. DIGGER PHELPS: What I really like about this kid is his tenacious attack on the offensive end. It reminds me of my time at Notre Dame—always upset-minded! He really hits the hole like a man on a mission. I haven't been really impressed with his recent performances. He's struggled offensively, and has been shut out from scoring altogether several times in the past couple of months. He finally seems to be off the schneid with this latest conquest, although his opponent wasn't of the quality we like to see this close to March. However, she was big, and guarded the lane like a pack of wild dogs! JAY BILAS: Dede Preno is a crafty veteran not gifted with great length or tremendous size down low. At times, he becomes frustrated, and his quickness can become a real liability. He has been reckless in the past and it has gotten him into lots of trouble. However, it's his effort that really captivates. He penetrates well, and if he can stay consistent with the upbeat tempo, I believe he'll have a successful March. - - - - OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES: - - - - ESPN's College GameDay Analyzes My Recent Sexual Encounter By Dede Preno If Career Services Coached Your Son in T-Ball ... By Taylor Payne Thrilling Chapter Endings You May Use in Your Next Novel By Zhubin Parang Perhaps My Pickup Lines Need Work By Frank Ferri Failing at Flirting With the Hot Girl at the Office Where My Friend Works By Dan Kennedy

- - - - MAIN PAGE   |   ARCHIVES   Memories of Amanda Davis   Red dot denotes content that is new today. Black dot denotes newish content. McSWEENEY'S STORE SUBSCRIBE TO: McSWEENEY'S THE BELIEVER WHOLPHIN FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE THE BEST AMERICAN NONREQUIRED READING McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES SUBMISSION GUIDELINES: FOR BOOKS FOR THE QUARTERLY FOR THE WEBSITE FOR WHOLPHIN McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS CONTACT US - - - - LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S LISTS McSWEENEY'S PREDICTS McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS NEW WHOLPHIN FILM DAN LIEBERT, VERBAL CARTOONIST JOKES BY BRIAN BEATTY REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD DISPATCHES FROM MANILA DISPATCHES FROM MOSCOW SO YOU WANT TO BE PRESIDENT? DISPATCHES FROM THE ANACOSTIA THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL BEN GREENMAN'S FAKE CELEBRITY MUSICALS DISPATCHES FROM A HUMANITARIAN JOURNALIST DEB OLIN UNFERTH'S SICK OF THE REVOLUTION DISPATCHES FROM IRAQ SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES PHILIP GRAHAM SPENDS A YEAR IN LISBON STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE DISPATCHES FROM THE NAPOLEONIC WARS AT THE MET KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE SONGS OF ENEMIES AND DESERTS: LIVING WITH THE SUDAN LIBERATION ARMY LAWRENCE WESCHLER'S EVERYTHING THAT RISES: A BOOK OF CONVERGENCES THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST ABOUT WHAT IS THE WHAT ABOUT BOWL OF CHERRIES ABOUT COMEDY BY THE NUMBERS ABOUT JOHN BRANDON'S ARKANSAS ABOUT MICHAEL CHABON'S MAPS AND LEGENDS ABOUT UNDERGROUND AMERICA ABOUT DEB OLIN UNFERTH'S VACATION LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY DISPATCHES FROM ADJUNCT FACULTY AT A LARGE STATE UNIVERSITY ADVICE FROM A PERSON WITH A BACHELOR'S DEGREE IN PSYCHOLOGY DISPATCHES FROM THE NBA ENTERTAINMENT LEAGUE JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES B.R. COHEN'S ANNALS OF SCIENCE INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN MICHAEL IAN BLACK IS A VERY FAMOUS CELEBRITY DISPATCHES FROM ROY KESEY, AN AMERICAN GUY MARRIED TO A PERUVIAN DIPLOMAT LIVING IN CHINA DAN KENNEDY SOLVES YOUR PROBLEMS WITH PAPER STEPHEN ELLIOTT'S POKER REPORT - - - - ADDITIONAL MATERIAL