THE JOHN WOODEN
PYRAMID OF SUCCESS
MEETS THE_REAL_SHAQ
TWITTER FEED.
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COMPETITIVE GREATNESS: "When the going gets tough, the tough get
going." Be at your best when your best is needed. Real love of a hard
battle.
SHAQ: I wanna b a ufc fighter, raaaaaaaaaaaaaa dats my growl , lol
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POISE: Just being yourself. Being at ease in any situation. Never
fighting yourself.
SHAQ: I'm watchin the maury povich show, I'm not the father, schwwwwww
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CONFIDENCE: Respect without fear. Confident not cocky. May come from
faith in yourself in knowing that you are prepared.
SHAQ: The nacho drag taco bell commercial is different
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CONDITION: Mental—Moral—Physical. Rest, exercise, and diet must be
considered. Dissipation must be eliminated.
SHAQ: Can I plaese cheat on my diet and go to dairy. Queen pls pls pls
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SKILL: A knowledge of and the ability to properly execute the
fundamentals. Be prepared. Cover every detail.
SHAQ: Just got a fresh cut for da game, dam I'm sugly, dats sexy and
ugly mixed in one
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TEAM SPIRIT: An eagerness to sacrifice personal interests or glory for
the welfare of all. The team comes first.
SHAQ: Just fed 400 families n orlando me and larry jones
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SELF-CONTROL: Emotions under control. Delicate adjustment between mind
and body. Keep judgment and common sense.
SHAQ: wintana is hot, I like dat daddy name winston momma named tonia
dats hot lol
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ALERTNESS: Be observing constantly. Be quick to spot a weakness and
correct it or use it as the case may warrant.
SHAQ: Its freezn n portland, schwlbbbbb schlwbbbb dats da lip shiver sound
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INITIATIVE: Cultivate the ability to make decisions and think alone.
Desire to excel.
SHAQ: I'm goin to the alamo tomorro to get one of those daniel boone
squirrel tail hats, I'm n san antonio, in case u didn't kno were the
alamo is
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INTENTNESS: Ability to resist temptation and stay with your course.
Concentrate on your objective and be determined to reach your goal.
SHAQ: No naps 4 the diesel today, but im ready 2 play
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INDUSTRIOUSNESS: There is no substitute for work. Worthwhile things
come from hard work and careful planning.
SHAQ: Weee weee wha weee weee wha weee wee weeee what's song is this
- - - -
FRIENDSHIP: Comes from mutual esteem, respect, and devotion. A sincere
liking for all.
SHAQ: Goodnite to all my brothers and sisters bout to watch
stepbrothers and unborn, plus my battery is dying
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LOYALTY: To yourself and to all those dependent upon you. Keep your
self-respect.
SHAQ: I had a nokia e90 but it fell n da toilet, now I have a
shaqberry lol, I'm a toilet twitterer
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COOPERATION: With all levels of your co-workers. Help others and see
the other side.
SHAQ: David stern just asked me if i twittered today, i love dat man,
he understands, love u all, peace, shalom, and happiness 2 everyone
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ENTHUSIASM: Your heart must be in your work. Stimulate others.
SHAQ: A Rastaman walks n2 a bank & hands the teller a bag of weed. She
says "Sir, what is this 4?" Da Rasta said, "Mi wan open a joint
account!
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OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES:
- - - -
The John Wooden Pyramid of Success Meets THE_REAL_SHAQ Twitter Feed By David Hart
Word Problems for the New Economic Landscape By Natalie Edwards
A 419 New Yorker E-mail Scam By Rupinder Gill
A Performance Review From My Boss, the Inebriate By Kent Woodyard and Joel Bobbett
My Reading-Tour Rider By Ben Greenman
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