Categories for
the Meta Awards.
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Best Acceptance Speech for This Award
Best Reaction to Winning This Award
Best Long, Rambling Speech, Which Must Be Forcefully Cut Short by the
Orchestra, Given After Receiving This Award
Most Confused That These Are the Meta Awards, Not The Mehindra
Excellence in Theatre Awards, and About to Be Further Confused That
He/She Has Won This Very Award, Even Though He/She Is Clearly in the
Wrong Place
Best Awkward Attempt to Leave The Stage from the Wrong Direction After
Accepting This Award
Best Usage of This Award to Further an Unrelated Pet Cause
Most Worthy of Winning This Award By Sheer Virtue of the Number of Times
He Has Not Previously Won This Award
Most Worthy of Winning This Award By Sheer Virtue of the Number of Times
She Has Not Previously Won This Award
Best Feigned Humility During Acceptance of This Award
Best Sound Editing in a Film or Documentary Short
Best Accidental Slip of a Profanity During the Acceptance Speech of This
Award
The Lifetime Achievement Award for Best Overall Ability to Have an
Entire Life Represented in a Moving, Two-Minute Montage
Best Long Shot Win of This Award
Best Overall Award Winner
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OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES:
- - - -
Categories for the Meta Awards By Curtis Retherford
Results from the 24th Existential Olympics in Bayonne, New Jersey By Jonathan Kaufman Nathan
Fail Whale Speaks By Marco Kaye
Diary of a Late Winter Romance By Kate Hahn
Coffee Bean Comment Cards as Written by a Recently Laid-Off Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien Staffer By Christian Lynch
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