Send your list submissions to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Advertising Slogans Targeted at the Lovecraftian Elder Gods.
BY GREG KNAUSS
Choosy black goats with a thousand young choose Jif.
American Express: Don’t leave R’yleth without it!
A-1 makes hamburgers taste like the rotting flesh of the conquered dead.
You’re in good oily, grasping tentacles with Allstate.
M&M’s: The milk chocolate melts in your maw, not in… whatever that is.
Campbell’s Soup: M’m! M’m! Aaagughguuggh!
The best part of rising from a thousand year slumber is Folgers in your cup.
Microsoft: Where do you want to go today? [Unchanged.]
SUGGESTED READSList: Ad Slogans That Would Be Perfect for Levitra, But, Unfortunately, They Have Already Been Used
by Hart Seely (6/21/2005)
List: More Realistic Makeup Slogans
by Liz Arcury (7/19/2011)
Use The Power of Subliminal Advertising in Your Brochure Text
by Dan Kennedy (9/29/2010)
RECENTLYLet’s Save Sitting!
by Liza Behles (5/22/2015)
How to Find Love: Lessons from an Old Maid: Halfway Point
by Connie Sun (5/22/2015)
List: Batting Heckles Uttered by the Dad On My Son’s Little League Team Who is a Meteorology Professor and Whose Research Interests Include Cloud-Based Analytics for Spatio-Temporal Data With a Primary Focus On Climate, Hydrological and Ecological Sciences
by Gary M. Almeter (5/22/2015)