ARCHIVE

Sestina: The One Where the Cake Ignites
by Jon Stone (4/17/2006)

When You Are The Fourth Consecutive Person To Ask For Money On The Subway, You Have To Bring It
by Michael Patrick Signorelli (4/17/2006)

List: The Future of Paper Plates
by Mark R. Mandel (4/14/2006)

List: Common Enemies of the Paperboy, According to the Nintendo Game of the Same Name
by Maggie Utgoff (4/14/2006)

List: Common Phrases Not Written in My High-School Yearbook, for a Multitude of Reasons
by Colleen Doyle (4/14/2006)

Public Service Announcement Paid For By The People For Electing Criss Angel, Mindfreak, In 2008’s Presidential Election
by Matt Christoph (4/14/2006)

Dispatches From a Real McSweeney: Karl, the Beckett Aficionado
by Timothy McSweeney (4/13/2006)

Sestina: Jewish Food
by Joan Larkin (4/13/2006)

FreeDarko’s Executive Quarters of Organized Basketball: In Our Brave Firmament, a Mole Lurks
by Bethlehem Shoals (4/13/2006)

My Helpful Tips for Fighting and Winning the War On Easter
by J. Chris Rock (4/13/2006)

The Convergences Contest: Contest Winner #7: Self-Made Constriction
by Sam Gaskin (4/13/2006)

Page Six By Jared Paul Stern
by Ben Greenman (4/12/2006)

Jokes by Brian Beatty: Red State and Whodunit
by Brian Beatty (4/11/2006)

Monologue: Timothy Treadwell’s Screen Tests for Cheers
by Eugenia Williamson (4/11/2006)

Possible “Surprise” Endings To The New Samuel L. Jackson Film Snakes On A Plane
by Kyle Nuske and Mark Keinath (4/10/2006)

List: Titles of Songs I Could Credibly Write If I Became a Rap Star
by Greg Howard (4/7/2006)

List: Medical Maladies Less Well Known Than Lou Gehrig’s Disease That Are Also Named After Athletes
by Scott Putnicki (4/7/2006)

A Mother Takes Over Amazon Customer Service
by Nathaniel Missildine (4/7/2006)

Dispatches From Roy Kesey, An American Guy Married to a Peruvian Diplomat Living in China: Dispatch 29: Harbin, Part III,
by Roy Kesey (4/6/2006)

Sestina: Tsunami
by Lewis Turco (4/6/2006)

Kevin Dolgin Tells You About Places You Should Go In Europe: Flying Over (and Stopping in) Bangkok
by Kevin Dolgin (4/6/2006)

FreeDarko’s Executive Quarters of Organized Basketball: The Little Tramp Is Still a Tramp
by Dr. Lawyer Indianchief (4/6/2006)

An Art History Professor Explains to His 4-Year-Old Daughter Why the Fair Market Value of Her Picture is Actually Far Less Than That of a Thousand Words
by Ethan Ryan (4/5/2006)

Dispatches from the NBA Entertainment League: Dispatch 13: The Game That Could Have Offered Payback
by Graham Murphy (4/5/2006)

A Rejected Submission to NPR’s “This I Believe.”
by Rachel Proctor May (4/4/2006)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to My Cat, Abbie
by Libby Black (4/4/2006)

Nihilist Job Résumé
by Eric Feezell (4/3/2006)

Jokes by Brian Beatty: My Method
by Brian Beatty (4/3/2006)

FreeDarko’s Executive Quarters of Organized Basketball: Keep the Sky Staying Up Above Me
by Bethlehem Shoals (3/31/2006)

The Convergences Contest: Contest Winner #6: The Antipodes
by Chris Zic (3/29/2006)

McSweeney’s is a publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. You can support us today by making a donation.