Ladies And Gentlemen Of The Jury
by Jon Fitch (5/12/2006)

Monologue: David Caruso Scolds His Cat About Its Lackadaisical Litter Box Use
by Brian Graham (5/11/2006)

FreeDarko’s Executive Quarters of Organized Basketball: Don’t Think I’m Just a Violent Guy
by Bethlehem Shoals (5/11/2006)

List: Habits That Are Harder to Break Than Peter Cetera’s Ex-Girlfriend
by Douglas Edwards (5/11/2006)

List: Good Advice From a Grand Theft Auto Dating FAQ
by David Abrams (5/11/2006)

List: Signs That America May Be Having a Love Affair With the Automobile
by Darren Addy (5/11/2006)

List: Possible Names for a Child Conceived by an Almond Fanatic and a Lover of the Movie Young Guns
by Eric Feezell (5/11/2006)

Further Evidence That Sportscenter Has Lost All Connection To Reality
by Ben Steele (5/10/2006)

Jokes by Brian Beatty: Pet Theory
by Brian Beatty (5/10/2006)

Feedback From James Joyce’s Submission of Ulysses to His Creative Writing Workshop
by Teddy Wayne (5/9/2006)

Sestina: dark fossils enough to sing of dotted orchids
by Camille Martin (5/9/2006)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to My Neighbors a Few Buildings Away in My Apartment Complex
by AJ Murray (5/9/2006)

Thanks for the Intervention
by Jay Dyckman (5/8/2006)

Cookie Monster Searches Deep Within Himself and Asks: Is Me Really Monster?
by Andy Bryan (5/5/2006)

List: Unpublished Sequels to Famous Science-Fiction Novels
by Steve Rushmore (5/5/2006)

List: Song Ideas for My Next Album
by Brian Geary (5/5/2006)

Thirteen Writing Prompts
by Dan Wiencek (5/4/2006)

Jokes by Brian Beatty: Um, Good and What Was I Thinking?
by Brian Beatty (5/4/2006)

Open Letters: An Open (Love) Letter to Taco Bell’s Crunchwrap Supreme
by Roxanne Paris (5/4/2006)

FreeDarko’s Executive Quarters of Organized Basketball: Festschrift for Annabel Lee
by Dr. Lawyer Indianchief (5/4/2006)

The Bruckheimer Quatrains
by Robert Hornak (5/3/2006)

Sestina: Reverie
by Michael Quattrone (5/3/2006)

Truly Groundbreaking Ideas In Direct Mail
by Dan Kennedy (5/2/2006)

Expert Help for Your Fantasy Baseball Franchise: Mailbag Seven
by Rick Paulas (5/2/2006)

Rejected Spots For The Army’s Current Ad Campaign, “Strength For Now, Strength For Later.”
by The Bros. Farhang (5/1/2006)

The Convergences Contest: Contest Winner #9: Painfully Unaware
by Dan Park (5/1/2006)

Reinventing The Mojito
by Kate Hahn (4/28/2006)

Open Letters: An Open Letter to an Ultimate-Fighting Referee
by Kurt W. Rademacher (4/28/2006)

Critter Corner With Lincoln Michel, Former Veterinary Assistant
by Lincoln Michel (4/27/2006)

Monologue: Britney Spears Responds to Daniel Edwards’s Sculpture Monument to Pro-Life: The Birth of Sean Preston
by Julie Bear (4/27/2006)

McSweeney’s is a publishing company based in San Francisco.
As well as operating a daily humor website, we also publish Timothy McSweeney’s Quarterly Concern, the Believer, and an ever-growing selection of books under various imprints. You can buy all of these things from our online store. We’re also transitioning to a nonprofit and would greatly appreciate your help. You can support us today by making a donation.