Teddy Wayne is the author of the novels Kapitoil and The Love Song of Jonny Valentine.
BY Teddy Wayne
Children should be seen and not heard—hey, where’s Tommy? Has anyone seen Tommy? I just assumed he was here, not making a sound, but… seriously, I can’t find him. I’m getting worried now. Yes, I looked in the restroom. Jonas, I’m telling you, he’s not here. Could he have left the restaurant? We would’ve seen him, don’t you think? Don’t blame me—if you hadn’t drunk a bottle of wine, maybe you’d have noticed him leave. Wait—he’s under the table. He was there the whole time. Tommy, never do that again, do you hear me? If you’re going to climb under the table, tell us before you do it and keep reminding us every minute or so that you’re down there.
SUGGESTED READSMom Takes Children’s Songs Literally
by Sarah Schmelling (1/11/2010)
Our Daughter Isn’t a Selfish Brat; Your Son Just Hasn’t Read Atlas Shrugged
by Eric Hague (8/12/2010)
List: What I Found in My Two-Year-Old Son’s Playroom
by John Moe (2/11/2003)
RECENTLYShort Story Template
by Peter Kispert (4/18/2014)
Monologue: The Holy Spirit Reacts to Jesus Sitting At the Right Hand of The Father
by Conor James McKeon (4/18/2014)
Putting the Biscuit in the Basket: A Review of Go for the Goal by Mia Hamm.
by Miles Wray (4/18/2014)