[Originally published March 18, 2008.]

- - - -

BEAST: I spy with my little eye, something … red.

FALSE PROPHET: Let’s see … is it the lake of fire and brimstone?

BEAST: Yes.

- - - -

BEAST: I spy with my little eye, something … red.

FALSE PROPHET: Is it the lake of fire?

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: Is it my shirt?

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: Wow, this one’s hard.

BEAST: Oh, wait. It actually was the lake of fire.

- - - -

BEAST: I spy with my little eye, something … red.

FALSE PROPHET: The lake of fire!

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: The fire in your hair?

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: The fire burning your eyeballs?

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: The fire burning my eyeballs?

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: Jeez, I give up.

BEAST: It’s fire.

FALSE PROPHET: Like fire in general?

BEAST: Yeah. Just … all the fire, everywhere.

FALSE PROPHET: Oh. Good one.

- - - -

BEAST: I spy with my little eye, something … orange.

FALSE PROPHET: Orange?

BEAST: Yes, orange.

FALSE PROPHET: Is it an orange?

BEAST: No.

FALSE PROPHET: The lake of fire?

BEAST: Close, but no.

FALSE PROPHET: Is it just the orange part of the lake of fire?

BEAST: Yes.

FALSE PROPHET: !!!