PLOT TO KILL SPIDER WITH COWBOY BOOT FOILED BY THOUGHT OF SPIDER GUTS ON BOOT
LEADING SMARTPHONE UNDER PILE OF DIRTY CLOTHES, PERHAPS
KETTLE ON BACK BURNER FOR NOW
30 MAYFLIES FOUND DEAD IN GLASS LIGHT FIXTURE; NO PLANS TO REMOVE BODIES ANYTIME SOON
WOMAN, 32, GOES BACK TO BED JUST HOURS AFTER WAKING UP
UNREAD NEW YORKERS FANNED OUT ON COFFEE TABLE
FRUIT ARRANGED BEAUTIFULLY IN BOWL, NO WITNESSES
SYRIA: WHERE EXACTLY IS THAT AGAIN?
GAS BILL SLATED TO BE OPENED WITH TEETH
POLL: HOW STURDY IS THIS STOOL I’M STANDING ON TO PEER INTO MY NEIGHBOR’S PARTY?