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NFL Mascots That Could Not Actually Wear A Football Helmet Without Suffocating.
BY SARAH WALTER
1. The Miami Dolphins’ Dolphin
SUGGESTED READSList: Current Football Players If They Decided to Spell Their Last Name Like Brett Favre
by Jason DeLorenzo (3/4/2005)
List: NFL Players Whose Names Sound Vaguely Dickensian, and the Characters They Would Be in an Actual Dickens Novel (2007–2008 Regular Season Edition)
by Susan Schorn (2/1/2008)
A Short Item about the Future
by Tim Carvell (1/10/2000)
RECENTLYWe Provide Meals That are Completely Unaffordable and Unappealing to People Who Actually Live in This Neighborhood
by Pablo Goldstein (8/22/2014)
Testomania: How is Your Love Life?
by Janet Manley (8/22/2014)
Open Letters: An Open Letter to the Passing Motorist Who Suggested I Take a Photograph of His Dick
by Cirrus Robert Wood (8/22/2014)
POPULARAirplane Passengers as Explained By Their Pants
by Wendi Aarons (5/4/2012)
Hello Stranger On the Street, Could You Please Tell Me How to Take Care of My Baby?
by Wendy Molyneux (8/16/2012)
List: What Your Favorite ’80s Band Says About You
by John Peck (7/5/2011)