On the Campaign Trail:
The Romney and Ryan Mystery Boys’ Series.
#51: The Mysterious Passageway
While housesitting for the neighborhood’s wealthiest widow, Paul is delighted to find Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged on her bookshelf. He pulls out the book for a light evening read but to his surprise, this selection causes the towering bookcase to rattle open—revealing a winding, musty corridor. Where could it lead? And what could Mrs. Bergmann be hiding in there?
#10: Danger at the Boarding School
While out canvassing the neighborhood one summer afternoon, Mitt spots Ann, the teenage daughter of the new neighbors down the block. With flowing blond hair, a glamorous cardigan, and a knowing smirk, Mitt knows she must be the girl of his dreams. But when reports of ghostly midnight events out at the girls’ boarding school start coming in, Mitt devises a foolproof plan to solve the mystery and win Ann’s heart.
#77: Rafalca’s Secret
Ever since her trip to London, Rafalca has been acting cagey and withdrawn. When mysterious packages and letters begin arriving for her in the mail—leading to her disappearance for days at a time—Mitt and Paul begin to wonder what kind of trouble Rafalca has found herself in.
#29: The Haunted Blazers
Every time it’s Paul’s turn to headline public campaign events, the blazers provided by the campaign wardrobe staffers inexplicably swell by three sizes, making Paul’s shredded bod look silly! Who—or what—could be sabotaging his time in the limelight?
#3: The Caffeinated Diet Coke Mix-Up
After a long day of glad-handing on the road, Mitt just wants to unwind with a can of caffeine-free Diet Coke, his very favorite beverage. But he opens the bus mini-fridge only to find it stocked with regular Diet Cokes. Is this the work of Jeremy, the naïve campaign staffer from Nebraska? Or could there be a more sinister force behind this ruthless crime?
#18: The Treasure in the Tax Returns
The gotcha journalists from the neighborhood homeowners’ association newsletter have been pestering Mitt to show them his tax returns if he and Paul plan to solve neighborhood mysteries for payment. But if they knew about the buried treasure map hidden inside Mitt’s tax files by a secretive, masked stranger—the very map which shows the location of an ancient treasure with earth-shaking power!—he knows they would let up. Mitt has already given these people all they need to know…
#46: The Sabotaged Jet Skis
Ever since Mitt first asked his beautiful neighbor, Ann, out for their first date, he has been looking for ways to impress her. But once they depart on a meticulously planned lake getaway (including brand-new, patriotic-hued life vests!), everything starts to go wrong. Before they know it, Ann and Mitt find themselves stuck on a speeding, runaway jet ski. Where could it be taking them? And what will they find there?
#101: An Unusual Invitation
After Mitt’s friend, Sheldon—the owner of the fanciest casino in town—meets Paul, the two boys receive a mysterious invitation in the mail. They are instructed to arrive at the casino at midnight sharp, dressed in masquerade masks and their fanciest tuxedos. Tonight, murder is afoot—and in this group of insane plutocrats, everyone is a suspect.
SUGGESTED READSRe: Hardy Boys Manuscript Submission
by Jay Dyckman (7/7/2005)
List: Hardy Boys Novel or Death Metal Album?
by David Epstein (5/20/2002)
List: Titles of Hardy Boys Books in Which the Villain Could Have Turned Out to Be George W. Bush
by Martin Bell (10/12/2004)
RECENTLYIt’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
by Colin Nissan (9/23/2014)
A McSweeney’s Books Interview with Courtney Moreno, Author of In Case of Emergency
by Courtney Moreno and Erin Minnick (9/23/2014)
Reviews of New Food
by Various New Food Tasters (9/23/2014)
POPULARIt’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
by Colin Nissan (9/23/2014)
A Generic College Paper
by Jon Wu (9/19/2014)
Best Joke Ever: Mitch Hedberg: Hippie Martian Zen Genius
by Mark Peters (8/28/2014)