Saddam Hussein, Master of the Limerick.
BY JOE O'NEILL
A swain who worked near the Euphrates
Had quite a smooth way with the ladies:
When he tried for a kiss,
He would not ever miss,
So I had him lowered into an acid bath until his screams woke the dead.
A Baath Party bureaucrat thought
He’d defy me and never get caught.
Imagine his shock
When, called in to talk,
He was thrown from the 12th-story window of the interrogation office.
One Abdul Ghani Shindala
Was especially good, a cappella,
At singing the praises
Of foes and disgraces,
So I had the traitorous cur assassinated after he fled the country.
A comely young lady from Nippur
Was always quite friendly and chipper.
It’s a shame to relate,
But her fiancé’s fate
Was to contribute to the labyrinth of bones beneath my torture stadium.
A Samarra cleric persisted
In the praising of persons blacklisted.
I was left little choice
But to limit his voice
By feeding his extracted tongue to birds of carrion.
SUGGESTED READSSubstitute Limericks
by Eric Silver (5/3/2004)
Saddam’s Interrogation Logs
by Brian Sack (4/20/2004)
The Convergences Contest: Contest Winner #21: Moral Confusion: Iraq, Munich, and Vietnam
by Donald Rumsfeld (11/2/2006)
RECENTLYShut Up About the Menopause Already, Chad
by Leah Hampton (8/31/2015)
Hungover Bear and Friends: Lose Sight of the Shore
by Ali Fitzgerald (8/31/2015)
List: Best Beards of Modernity: Five Hairy Haikus
by Nathan Patton (8/31/2015)
POPULARFirst Faculty Meeting of the Year Bingo
by Lisa Nikolidakis (8/25/2015)
“Hell is Empty and All the Devils are Here”: A Shakespearean Guide to the 2016 Republican Primary
by Emily Uecker (8/6/2015)
Donald Trump, Through the Ages
by John Flowers (8/13/2015)