I’ve got a present for you!
Think fast!
Here.
Got a little something for you.
Just because I like you so much…
Do you have trash under there?
Thanks.
Aw, I got this just for you, Sarah!
Would you mind?
Watch out, this might be sticky.
synthesizes tenets of the Frankfurt School, Chicago School and the School of Hard Knocks into long, rambling diatribes.
Lists
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Mountain Man Dance Moves: The McSweeney’s Book of Lists is available for purchase at any bookstore you care to name.
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Things People Said to Me While I Worked the Front Desk in Lieu of “Would you throw this away for me?”.
I’ve got a present for you!
Think fast!
Here.
Got a little something for you.
Just because I like you so much…
Do you have trash under there?
Thanks.
Aw, I got this just for you, Sarah!
Would you mind?
Watch out, this might be sticky.
See all articles from this column