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What the Stock Pages Would Look Like if Businesses Chose Ticker Abbreviations the Way Bar Patrons Choose Initials for Arcade-Game High-Score Lists.
BY B.M. LILLEY
ASS -1 1/4
SEX +1 3/4
SUGGESTED READSList: Rejected Arcade Games
by Jules Lipoff (4/2/2002)
List: Currently Available Stock Symbols that Might Lead to an Underwhelming IPO
by Brian Sack (4/2/2004)
List: Biblical Figures of the NYSE
by Jim Connelly (12/3/2009)
RECENTLY2014: A Facebook Odyssey
by Ben Jurney (8/29/2014)
I Like Big Brass and I Cannot Lie: Confessions from the Tuba World: You Tuba Players Can’t Deny
by Elizabeth Eshelman (8/29/2014)
List: Cartoon Character Revelations Inspired by the News that Hello Kitty is NOT a Cat
by Dorothy Bendel (8/29/2014)
POPULARHello Stranger On the Street, Could You Please Tell Me How to Take Care of My Baby?
by Wendy Molyneux (8/16/2012)
List: What Your Favorite ’80s Band Says About You
by John Peck (7/5/2011)
Airplane Passengers as Explained By Their Pants
by Wendi Aarons (5/4/2012)