Recycle it.
Make a collage.
Donate it to Goodwill.
Sell it on eBay.
I don’t know. Do you want it?
Consolidate it into a smaller trunk.
Preserve it so that my grandchildren may have a meaningful connection to their heritage.
Shoot it up.
Lists
- - - -
Send your list submissions to lists@mcsweeneys.net.
Mountain Man Dance Moves: The McSweeney’s Book of Lists is available for purchase at any bookstore you care to name.
See all articles from this column
- - - -
What You Gon’ Do With All That Junk Inside That Trunk?
BY Lucas Cox
- - - -
See all articles from this column
SUGGESTED READS
Let’s Listen to My Favorite Song Togetherby Joe Berkowitz (9/13/2010)
Do They Know It’s Christmas After All?
by Henry Alford (1/4/2000)
Short Essays on Favorite Songs, Inspired by Nick Hornby’s Songbook: Every Sha La La La, Every Oh No
by Michelle Orange (1/15/2003)
RECENTLY
The Consumer Product Safety Commission Has Issued a Voluntary Recall for “Baby Boomers.”
by John Flowers (2/9/2012)
List: And When Your Sister Said That, You Knew She Was a Narcissist
by Megan Twiddy (2/9/2012)
The Chorus Boy Chronicles: A Bandit, Full and Hollow
by Brian Spitulnik (2/9/2012)
POPULAR
In Which I Fix My Girlfriend’s Grandparents’ WiFi and Am Hailed as a Conquering Heroby Mike Lacher (1/20/2012)
Monologue: I’m Comic Sans, Asshole.
by Mike Lacher (6/15/2010)
On the Implausibility of the Death Star’s Trash Compactor
by Joshua Tyree (1/10/2002)