Yiddish Spam
by Matthew David Brozik (12/13/2007)

Songs of the Beach Boys Adapted as Homeric Hymns (Circa 800 B.C.)
by Alexander Nazaryan (12/13/2007)

The Lesser-Known Slogans of Political Moderates
by Kate Johansen and Katie Bukowski (12/13/2007)

Rarely Used Parenthetical Statements
by Erik Karjala (12/7/2007)

Twisted Sister: Where Are They Now?
by Jon Clarke and Michael Drucker (12/7/2007)

James Bond Films for the George W. Bush Era
by Christopher A. Smith (12/7/2007)

Increasingly Dangerous Cheeses
by Lucas Klauss (11/29/2007)

How-To Books Based on Pregnancy Bestsellers
by David Fuad (11/29/2007)

Twenty-First-Century Computing, as Explained by My Mother
by Pasha Malla (11/29/2007)

A Hillbilly Thanksgiving
by Mark Fisher (11/21/2007)

Lifetime Television Movies of the Future
by Jessie Cantrell (11/21/2007)

Lowbrow TV Programming for Linguists
by Andrew C. Duenas (11/21/2007)

Billy Ray Cyrus’s Remaining Daughters and the Relative Worth of Their Concert Tickets
by Mark Squirek (11/15/2007)

Personals From Nonpersons
by Peter Cameron (11/15/2007)

Chain Restaurants That Went Kosher
by Jacob Stulberg (11/15/2007)

Top Hip-Hop Acts of 18th-Century England
by Mike Richardson-Bryan (11/8/2007)

State Mottoes for the Severely Depressed
by Wendy Molyneux (11/8/2007)

New Romantic-Networking Websites for the Single Archaeologist
by Eric Feezell and Gladstone (11/8/2007)

Innovative Mischief-Night Pranks You Are More Than Welcome to Play on Me
by Frank Ferri (10/31/2007)

Embarrassing Costumes My Dad Wore on Trick-or-Treat Night
by Nathan Thornton (10/31/2007)

Dr. Caligari’s Storage Areas
by Cody Shaffer (10/31/2007)

Things That Will Destroy My Heterosexual Marriage Long Before Gay Marriage Ever Will
by Nick Sustana (10/25/2007)

Popular Song Titles Had They Been Written by Richard Wagner
by Josh Knisely (10/25/2007)

Spinoffs of Dancing With the Stars for the Common Man
by Maggie Utgoff (10/25/2007)

Possible Titles for Kanye West’s Next Album
by Kris Giuliani (10/19/2007)

Bad News Bears
by Oriana Schwartzentruber (10/19/2007)

Exotic Blitzes
by Daniel Leahy (10/19/2007)

Progressive-Rock Fans Are Terrible Trash-Talkers
by Gladstone (10/19/2007)

Horror Movies for Kids
by Ian Carey (10/11/2007)

Adjectives Rejected in Favor of “Kafkaesque.”
by Ryan Nyburg (10/11/2007)

The Songs of Lenin and McCarthy
by Jimmy Chen (10/11/2007)

Possible Titles for My Autobiography
by Helene Hertzlinger (10/4/2007)

Unpopular Poetry Anthologies by Unpopular Poets
by Eric Kocher (10/4/2007)

Common Illnesses at the Vatican
by Elvis Dingeldein (9/27/2007)

Hastily Penned Books Written by High-Profile Authors in Response to a Public Disgrace
by Joshua Shreve (9/27/2007)

Two Lists of Complaints
by Stuart Zehner (9/27/2007)

Iraq-War Cliché or New Euphemisms for Taking a Crap?
by Kevin Griffiths (9/19/2007)

Selected Reading Materials From the Waiting Room of Albert Camus, D.D.S
by Adam Shalvey (9/19/2007)

Expressions for Vegans
by Michael Armstrong (9/19/2007)

My Film-Summary Exercises From Screenwriting Class (as Edited by My Pregnant Wife)
by Gladstone and Louisa Bonnanzio (8/30/2007)

Thirty Illnesses, Sorted According to Whether or Not You Can Eat the Victims
by Maryam Akbari and Sean Michaels (8/30/2007)

Titles of Cinema Classics That Would Be Bad Titles for Pornographic Films
by Matthew Sewell (8/30/2007)

Vacation Slogans for Lower-Tier Towns
by Audrey Ngo-Lee and James Brink (8/22/2007)

Phrases Commonly Used by 1950s Housewives That Were Often Misinterpreted by the Housewives’ Husbands as Blatant Requests for Sex
by Whitney Collins (8/22/2007)

Ways I’ve Let Down Popular Musicians
by John Moe (8/22/2007)

Grimm Fairy Tales Made Decidedly More Grim
by Jonathan Shipley (8/9/2007)

Things Said by the Presenter of a Seminar on the Future of Color in Printing
by Susan Morton (8/9/2007)

Possible Catch Phrases for the Ending of a TV Show Called Guantanamo Five-O
by Charlie Hopper (8/9/2007)

Freudian Notes My Hasty Doctor Wrote in My Medical Chart
by Amanda Murphy (8/3/2007)

Less Successful Heavy-Metal Wedding Tribute Bands
by Brian Shields (8/3/2007)

Who Said It: Vice President Dick Cheney or Phil Leotardo From The Sopranos?
by Benjamin Freed (8/3/2007)

Things I Have Learned From Ex-Boyfriends
by Megan Robin (7/26/2007)

Past and Future Magazine Titles That Map Our Intellectual Decline
by Andrew dePasquale (7/26/2007)

Alternate Fairy-Tale Endings to Take the Place of “And they lived happily ever after.”
by Sabrina Abbott (7/26/2007)

Things I Was Thinking in Hot Topic After My 3-Year-Old Daughter and I Were Greeted by a Very Provocatively Dressed Salesgirl
by Gladstone (7/19/2007)

Lies Printed on My Waffle Iron
by Annie Mackey (7/19/2007)

Two Things That Aren’t Covered by Your Friend With Benefits
by Matthew Simmons (7/19/2007)

My Father’s Harper’s Index
by Dan Kennedy (7/12/2007)

Titles From Dr. Seuss’s Brief Foray Into Realism
by J. Alex Boyd and Jonathan Baude (7/12/2007)

Four Simple Steps to Becoming More Decisive
by Andrew R. Juhl (7/12/2007)

Actual Instructions for “Demolition to Prevent Enemy Use [of Slide Projectors],” From the U.S. War Department, 1943
by Jamba Dunn (6/29/2007)

Signs of Impending Suicide That Hemingway’s Friends May Have Overlooked
by Mark Wilcoxson (6/29/2007)

The Year After the Year of Living Dangerously
by Jennifer Gorman (6/29/2007)

Less-Imposing Russian Rulers
by Scott Shemo (6/22/2007)

Other Cereals From the Makers of Kashi’s “Good Friends.”
by David Wolinsky (6/22/2007)

Ways in Which the Hunter Might Become the Hunted
by Matt Suddain (6/22/2007)

Ron Jeremy’s Filmography If He Had Played the Banjo Instead of Having Anal Sex
by William Volk (6/8/2007)

FAQ for Dogs
by Neahmiah Scudder (6/8/2007)

Unlikely Disasters
by Gabe Koplowitz (6/8/2007)

Cultural Instances Other Than Bob Dylan’s 1965 Newport Folk Festival Set When “Going Electric” Was Met With Considerable Public Outcry
by Marty Bregman (6/1/2007)

Literary TV Programs Yet to Be Produced
by Christian Clarke (6/1/2007)

Terms Generally Not Used by Pugilists
by Scott Evans (6/1/2007)

My Nonprofit R&B Group’s Set List
by B. Davin Stengal (5/25/2007)

Jenny’s Alternate Numbers
by Gretchen VanWormer (5/25/2007)

Phrases in My Apartment Listing on Craigslist That Most Likely Hurt My Chances of Finding a Renter
by Cal Newport (5/25/2007)

The White House’s Conditions Under Which Harriet Miers and Karl Rove Will Testify Before Congress
by Matthew Belinkie (5/18/2007)

I’m Reasonably Confident I Would Beat Ken Jennings in These Jeopardy! Categories
by Owen Morris (5/18/2007)

Haiku a Bitter Duck Might Write
by Jay Silverman (5/18/2007)

Thomas Hobbes’s “State of Nature” Adjectives That Befit My Hangover
by Julianne Smolinski (5/11/2007)

Titles of Songs From Pet Sounds, Translated In and Out of Japanese by Google Translate
by Daniel Byndas (5/11/2007)

Ways to Tell a Coral Snake From a Milk Snake
by Byron Boneparth (5/4/2007)

What Does Your Name Say About You?
by Felix Kent (5/4/2007)

Mundane Dreams
by Daniel M. Shapiro and Jessy Randall (5/4/2007)

The Names of Snow White’s Seven Dwarfs After Being Prescribed Paxil, Ritalin, Prozac, Lithium, Provigil, and Benadryl
by Jeffrey Greenstein (4/25/2007)

What People Said Tornadoes Sounded Like Before the Invention of the Freight Train (in Reverse Chronological Order)
by L.T. Chong (4/25/2007)

Zen Parable or Just Someone Being Cruel?
by Damian Hass (4/20/2007)

Other Options Available on the New Poetry SUV
by Brett Ortler (4/16/2007)

Words I See When I Read the Phrase “Intelligent Design” While Squinting
by David Ng (4/11/2007)

We Have Ways to Make You Talk
by Ralph Gamelli (4/11/2007)

Alternate Titles to Barack Obama’s Book The Audacity of Hope If It Had Been Written by President Bush
by David Perkins (4/11/2007)

An Oversimplified List of Options in Iraq
by David Cassel (4/6/2007)

Failed Ben & Jerry’s Flavors
by John McMurtrie (4/6/2007)

Probable Future Names of Hershey’s Candies, Following the Progression of Kisses to Hugs
by Daniel Nass, Daniel Peach and Robby McInnes (4/6/2007)

The Plot of an Adult Film, Ford F-Series, Told Chronologically Through Car Model Names
by Jeff Russell (3/23/2007)

What I Think the Illegible Gang Graffiti That Was Spray-Painted Onto My Apartment Building Actually Says
by Robyn Nisi (3/23/2007)

Locations on My Person Where It Is Possible to Hide a Machete, According to the TSA Employee Who Patted Me Down at Flint Bishop Airport, in Flint, Michigan
by Kelly Parker (3/23/2007)

Topics of Conversation at My Cousin’s House on Any Given Holiday
by Jason Rohrbacker (3/16/2007)

Possible Titles for Future Sue Grafton Novels After She Runs Out of Letters
by Chris Steck (3/16/2007)

Clint Eastwood Film or Gay Porn?
by Joe John (3/16/2007)

Snow White and the Seven Goths
by Lillian Crombie, Paul Dobson, Paul Zinkel and Pauline Brown (3/9/2007)