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Now available for preorder:
The San Francisco Panorama.

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M c S W E E N E Y ' S B R A I N   E X P L O D E R : A N S W E R S . - - - - "REVENGE OF THE HUNT AND PECKERS." August 20 Last week, readers were asked to use their cell phone text messaging skills and provide answers to clues using only a certain amount of clicks of each button on the phone's face. This week's winner is Erin Peterson. The questions and answers were as follows: One click: A dripping canine is urged to placate the beloved head of the household with his only trick. WAG A DAMP PAW AT MAD DAD (also PAPA, MA, MAMA, or PA) Two Clicks: Exclamation upon encountering a particularly regal member of the Hymenoptera family. EEK! QUEEN BEE! Three Clicks: A nearly tearful child, frustrated with his parakeet's refusal to leave his perch, offers an ultimatum. Hint: The parakeet is named after an actor in westerns or a fast food chain. FLY OR I'LL CRY, ROY (also FLY OFF…) Four Clicks: Soundly slumbering. ZZZZZZZ (also ZZZZZZZS or various combinations of Z's and S's) - - - - As is the case with many of our favorite puzzles, entrants were extremely creative and we accepted many alternative answers. Just some of them included: FORMAL COMMAND, INFORMAL SLEEP WEAR "Damp Madam, paw pajama tag at mad dad." — Matt Reed YOU CAN'T TEACH AN OLD DOG GEOGRAPHY "Wag a damp paw at Tampa papa!" — Dan London (similarly, Mike Stefanik) MY DOG RESPONDS TO DIALECTS "Wag at dat mad dad, gap jaw'd damp dawg." — Dan Anderson SUPER INTELLIGENT SITCOM PET IN MILITARY TIME MACHINE "Maj. Dad Mad. Jam WPA [Works Progress Administration] data, damp dawg!" EXCLAIMED BY ENTHUSIASTIC ENTOMOLOGISTS "Keen! Queen Bee!" — Various EXCLAIMED BY "BARBARA BUSH ON VACATION" "Eek! Kennebunk Queen Bee!" — Dan London EXCLAIMED BY "MARK EICHORN IN THE 1990 TORONTO BLUE JAYS BULLPEN" "Henke! Queen Bee!" — Dan London TOUGH LOVE "Roy, fly or fry!" — Bill DeRouchey, Chris Eckert and others MR. T, CRANKY CHILD BIRD OWNER "Roy, fly off, fool, or I'll cry!" — James Koss I LIKE MY BIRDS FLAMBOYANT "Frolic or I'll cry, Fil." — Charles Star (Not sure who Fil is, but we liked frolic so much we gave it to him. — ed.) WE ACCEPT YOUR LENGTHY EXPLANATION "Fly off cliff, Roy, or I vilify yo' ivory-color' lori." [Note: parakeets and lorikeets are both order Psittaiiformes and family Psittacidae, but are never the same genus, nonetheless species, therefore it is pure fantasy to believe that they would date each other. Also they have no shame.] — TG Gibbon     MORE BRAIN EXPLODERS

- - - - MAIN PAGE | ARCHIVES Memories of Amanda Davis Red dot denotes content that is new today. Black dot denotes newish content. McSWEENEY'S STORE SUBSCRIBE TO: McSWEENEY'S THE BELIEVER WHOLPHIN FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE THE BEST AMERICAN NONREQUIRED READING McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST BOOKSTORES WITH A McSWEENEY'S DISPLAY McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES SUBMISSION GUIDELINES: FOR BOOKS FOR THE QUARTERLY FOR THE WEBSITE FOR WHOLPHIN McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS CONTACT US - - - - LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S LISTS McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD NEW WHOLPHIN FILM DAN LIEBERT, VERBAL CARTOONIST TEDDY WAYNE'S UNPOPULAR PROVERBS NON-ESSENTIAL MNEMONICS BITCHSLAP: A COLUMN ABOUT WOMEN AND FIGHTING DISPATCHES FROM A GUY TRYING UNSUCCESSFULLY TO SELL A SONG IN NASHVILLE GLOBAL WAR ON BEDBUGS: LETTERS FROM BEDBUG CITY THE CONFLICTED EXISTENCE OF A FEMALE PORN WRITER OH MY GAWD: A COLUMN ABOUT A TEENAGER NAVIGATING RELIGION DISPATCHES FROM MANILA DISPATCHES FROM AN INDIAN CASINO THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST CHRIS WHITE ANSWERS PROFOUND QUESTIONS ABOUT THE PRESIDENTS REPORTS FROM THE PINBALL SCENE LETTERS FROM THE HELLBOX NOTES FROM AN AMATEUR SPECTATOR AT AMATEUR MIXED MARTIAL ARTS FIGHTS B.R. COHEN'S DAYS AT THE MUSEUM CONVERSATIONS AT A WARTIME CAFÉ AND HERE'S THE KICKER: MIKE SACKS'S CONVERSATIONS WITH HUMOR WRITERS GRANT MUNROE'S CORPORATE FOLKTALES SARAH WALKER SHOWS YOU HOW DISPATCHES FROM AN ENVIRONMENTAL LAWYER WHO IS TRYING TO GROW A MUSTACHE DISPATCHES FROM A HANGDOG BANKRUPT DISPATCHES FROM THE CAPITAL DISPATCHES FROM INDIA THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL SEAN MICHAELS LISTENS TO MUSIC IN MONTREAL SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES KIDS' LETTERS TO PRESIDENT OBAMA STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE YOUR MONEY, YOUR JOB ... YOUR LIFE, WITH ALISON ROSEN KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE ABOUT THE WILD THINGS ABOUT THE CONVALESCENT ABOUT FEVER CHART ABOUT GOD SAYS NO ABOUT ZEITOUN LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY E-MAILS SENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA ENGLISH DEPARTMENT FLAG-FOOTBALL TEAM TRAVELING EUROPE IN STYLE WITH AUCKLAND DINGIROO, DARK-AGE TOURIST AND CRITIC OF FOOD AND DRINK JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS FLIP: A COLUMN ABOUT SKATEBOARDING OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN MICHAEL IAN BLACK IS A VERY FAMOUS CELEBRITY DAN KENNEDY SOLVES YOUR PROBLEMS WITH PAPER STEPHEN ELLIOTT'S POKER REPORT - - - - ADDITIONAL MATERIAL