Titles of Sermons
to Which Congregants Might Actually
Pay Attention.
BY JASON KELLETT
- - - -
"The Ten Commandments—Loopholes And Safe Harbors: The Technicalities You've Never Thought Of"
"Adultery: God Says 'Thou Shalt Not,' and That's Especially True for Pastors' Wives. Did You Hear That, Vile Woman?"
"Gross Is Good: The Lord Shall Smite the Net Tithers"
"The Death Penalty—Yea or Nay? Your Guess Is As Good As Mine"
"Our God Is a Bearded God"
"Holy Crap! It's the Holy Ghost and This Place Is Haunted!"
"Hey, What Is the Deal With Transubstantiation? I Mean, Am I Right, People? That Guy Knows What I'm Sayin'"
"How Much Good Would the Good Book Book If the Good Book Could Book Good?"
"The Book of Revelation: From Whence Came the Beginning of That Bitchin' Johnny Cash Tune That Played Over the Opening Credits of the New Dawn of the Dead Movie"
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