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Millard Kaufman's final novel has arrived!
Pick up Misadventure now—or, see what
you've missed out on thus far by picking up
both Bowl of Cherries and Misadventure
for 27% off the retail price.

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W H A T   I   A C T U A L L Y M E A N   W H E N   I   S A Y I   L O V E   Y O U : T H I R T Y   S C E N A R I O S BY SHELLEY MCINTYRE - - - - Do you want to talk about it? You look tired. Please don't be mad at me. I approve of your behavior at this moment. Please stop talking. You look attractive. These words are meaningless and I hate saying them. It's good to be home. You tell really good stories. Please let me go to sleep. I want you to make me feel less sad. I admire your self-confidence. Thank you for that excellent sex. I didn't mean to hurt you. There is nothing I can do to help you feel better. Thank you for telling me I look beautiful even when I feel like hell. I know you need assurances that I feel the same way about you. I am about to tell you exactly why I am furious with you. Thank you for being nice to my mother. Thank you for wearing the shirt I bought you. I'm sorry I left the back door unlocked again. Thank you for not complaining that I went out last night. You have the emotional maturity of a petulant five-year-old. I know you hate these cocktail parties. That is the exact CD I wanted to hear. I know it bothers you that we sometimes say the same thing at the same time. Thank you for not being an asshole while I flirted with that guy in front of you. I have bad cramps so please forgive me for not responding to your advances. Thank you for finally giving up your unrealistic goal of becoming a playboy globetrotter. Thank you for massaging my feet even though you don't like feet.   MORE LISTS

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