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Advertisement for chili-filled hotdog Voice over: First we filled them with cheese, now, say hello to Hormel's Chili-Filled Franks! An animated lightning bolt strikes one of the dogs, thus causing the item to burst open and void its chili-like insides. My father: Gross - - - - Cable access program: Kickin' Back Show hostess Loretta interviews one of the local homeless people identified as "Hotbox." Loretta: How many years were you a stuntman? Any movies that we've… Hotbox: Everything. Loretta: Everything? Hotbox: Years. Loretta: And what about the military, were you in the service? My father: You have got to be kidding me. - - - - Common holiday advertisement for Coke Polar bears toss beach ball in the arctic. Beach ball falls into water where a seal returns it to the bears. For its effort, seal is served a Coke. My father: Riiiiiigggghhhht. - - - - The much-anticipated HBO Saturday Night Movie Voiceover: Next up, Black Moon Rising with Tommy Lee Jones and Linda Hamilton. Voiceover: This movie has been rated R. My father: This has Linda Hamilton in it, and she's bound to take her clothes off. Go to your room for a while. - - - - M*A*S*H, the movie My father: This was before the show. This was also the first time that I ever heard an actor say "fuck." - - - - The first Cannonball Run movie. Jack Elam extends a very long middle finger Jack Elam: Take one of these and call me in the morning. My father: In the sixties, I raced a real one of these with your half-brother. Let me assure you that this kind of behavior would have gotten us killed. - - - - Willie Nelson performs his duet with Julio Iglesias, "To All the Girls I've Loved Before" My father: It's Willie and Julio "Eagleass." (snicker)
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