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In eight illustrated books, elegantly held together in a single beribboned case, McSweeney's Issue 28 explores the state of the fable. For the next two days, it's $5 off.

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Go, You Redbirds.

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T H O U G H T S   O N
S E P T E M B E R   1 7 ,   2 0 0 4 .

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BY JUNE MIMSON

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 Matt says, "I can do it. Give me the ball."
 The hitters trust him—the Cards rarely lose
 when he takes the hill. They assume they'll win.
 Let him start Game One. (He does best when cheered
 at home and at night.) For fall after fall, 
 we've seen him do it. He can take the heat. 

 Filthy curve, cutter, changeup, and good heat. 
 There are few things Carp can't do with the ball. 
 They need him to dominate through the fall
 and postseason. Boy, has Toronto's loss
 been St. Louis' gain! I know I'll cheer
 for this comeback kid to get 20 wins. 

 No one likes to lose, but Scott has to win. 
 He traded Bowa and media heat
 for loving fans, and the natural cheer
 that comes from playing .750 ball
 for most of the season. They will not lose, 
 if he can help it, till confetti falls. 

 It may seem that his numbers can only fall, 
 and as long as Barry plays, he won't win
 that MVP. But Albert does not lose
 any luster for that. He's always hot, 
 and will be one of the best ever to play ball. 
 MVP or not, he's worth every cheer. 

 Hollywood! Of course he loves to hear cheers. 
 Sure, he might wince, or dramatically fall, 
 after he snatches yet another ball
 from over the outfield fence. But Jim wins
 with his glove AND his bat. Sometimes he's hot, 
 sometimes not. But with him, it's hard to lose. 

 "We love thee with a love we seemed to lose
 with our lost saints"—Red, Ozzie, Stan; "we cheer
 through April frosts and wilting August heat; 
 we will you to advance deep into fall. 
 This year we expect that last, sweetest win." 
 Lord, does Cardinal Nation love baseball. 

 All season, you could barely lose. This fall, 
 as red-clad thousands cheer for you to win, 
 turn the heat back on, boys ... and win it all. 

 

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