Perfect for Mother's Day: the Baby Be of Use series or The Secret Language of Sleep. - - - - |
Napoleon Dynastina.BY RANDY LUCAS
jumps off this ramp we built in front of his house the other day after school. When I got home, Kip showed me his cage-fighting skills. He's got like the worst reflexes ever, gosh, IDIOT! Deb probably thinks I'm an idiot. Because of stupid Kip, dang! She did give me one of her boondoggle keychains, SWEET! I should probably use my secret ninja skills and catch her a delicious bass with a spear I built last summer during school break. I made it in Alaska at my cousins' house. When I got to my house today, Uncle Rico was acting like a flippin' IDIOT! I came home from school to find a friggin' sweet time machine I thought Kip built. It turned out it was just a decroded piece of crap with crotch-electrocuting skills. My stupid Uncle Rico is jealous of all my skills and won't leave our house. He's been eating all our steak and built up a big pile of crap he's trying to sell to idiots like my former woman Trisha's mom. I drew her a friggin' sweet portrait. It's the best work I've ever done, except Pedro's posters at school. Oh and about school, there's a butt-load of gangs that want me and Pedro for our skills; bowstaff skills, numchuck skills, computer-hacking skills, plus Pedro has a sweet mustache and hooks up with lots of chicks. We went to Summer Wheatley's house, and ran off like a couple of idiots, but you should have seen the cake Pedro built. I wish I could have just built Deb a cake, but during Pedro's skit at school I made Summer's gang look like the idiots they really are. I pulled out my "D-Qwon's dance groove" skills I had been practicing at my house. I just danced to the tape LaFawnduh gave me, which was pretty friggin' sweet! Scientists built Grandma a new coccyx while Kip and LaFawnduh learned new marital skills. Pedro is now president of the school and Uncle Rico finally left the house. Despite Uncle Rico acting like an IDIOT, things between me and Deb turned out friggin' SWEET!
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