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Now available for preorder:
The San Francisco Panorama
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M c S W E E N E Y ' S   N E W S .

This page will be updated occasionally, notifying readers of developments, special offers, etc. from McSweeney's. All offers are real, unless they are obviously not real.

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MARCH 31

Dear M.R.,
So what is really going on with this McSweeney's Family? I do applaud their efforts to help your site, but I am getting a weird feeling that their interests are not exactly pure. I mean, Gerry McSweeney seems nice, but.... I don't know. I must admit I'm worried.
Concerned for Your Concern,
Steve Davis
Chicago

Well Concerned,
We are a wee bit concerned, too. The whole thing seemed like a pretty great idea at first — not so much for the money, which will help us, and the web support from Brendan, which also makes things easier, but for the sheer novelty of collaborating with the McSweeneys.com family, which we have known and admired from afar, for so long. And for a while everything was splendid. The McSweeneys were charming and very astute. They also liked the oddness of our collusion, and saw the value in their publishing our site, in the vanity project sort of vein. They promised that they would sit back, help us with the machinery of the whole thing, and otherwise leave us alone.

But I must be honest, the whole thing is now a little shaky. We still have the utmost respect for the McSweeneys, and still hope that this can all work out for the best, but I must say — and I say this knowing that Gerry and Wendy are reading this — that some of their ideas, and their opinions about the direction of the site(s), are not exactly in sync with ours. As you know, this site, our site, was started with a certain spirit of independence, and we have done what we could to avoid any entanglements — with advertisers, for example — that would influence our editorial decisions.

But now we find ourselves in a position where many of the things we have done for a long time, and want to continue to do, are being challenged. And though again, we respect the McSweeneys, especially Gerry, we would like to make clear that we made this site what it is, and we must have been doing something right, to have attracted the readers we have, bright and devoted as they are. With all due respect, why anyone would want to seriously tamper with that formula is beyond me.

But anyway. I am sure that in the next few days we will figure it all out. Gerry is a good man, and we will surely reach a compromise. We really do want to work with the McSweeneys, and think this could be a lot of fun, but we also want to continue to bring you the McSweeney's that you have come to know and respect.

Thanks for your patience.

The M.R.

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MARCH 21

Oh God that was fun. People, we have had events before, all of them fun in some or other way, but nothing before has compared to the Galapagos event of last Thursday. Good lord, this was an amazing thing. Planned entirely without the aid of the M.R., it naturally went off without a hitch. First of all, the venue, this place called Galapagos, is probably the very best use of bricks and mortar yet created by man. And the owner, a man named Christopher -- who by the way charged us nothing for the use of the facility, and his staff... we, at McSweeney's, as a whole, are in the planning stages of marrying all of them, as soon as we can work out the logistics and legalities.

Some details for you all who could not attend:

1) There was a man in a caveman suit.
2) Arthur Bradford smashed a guitar, a real guitar, against the cement wall, sending guitar-shards everywhere, including one which landed atop his head, and which sat there for the next three/four minutes, while he finished his reading. No one told him and he looked funny.
3) Neal Pollack, after all of the readings were done and most of the attendees had moved on, returned to the microphone, and read to anyone who would listen.
4) Behind those reading was a painting painted by Arthur Bradford's mother, who is a professional art-making person. The painting was of a man flying while wearing a cape, and it was a beautiful thing.
5) Haircuts were given, as promised, during intermission. Four volunteers received excellent haircuts, though most wanted only trims, for some reason. After these four, one non-volunteer, a friend of the haircutter, was forced into receiving a haircut, and his hair was blow-dried in a very pronounced way, in the manner preferred by salon stylists everywhere, who love the effects created by hot wind blowing from below the hairline, up. After the blowdryer's work was done, this client looked spectactular. NOTE: The haircutter asked for no monetary reward for his haircuts, and because he so enjoyed the experience and even learned from it -- he is getting better all the time -- he will now be offering haircuts to all Lifetime Subscribers, past or present. Details will be forthcoming.
6) Matthew Klam, who has a short story collection arriving in May, read aloud, and when he read, he was great, but he said many dirty things. His story, which truth be told was part of a novel, involved a woman named Martha. Later, after the readings, a woman named Martha introduced herself to one of the organizers by saying, "Hi, I'm Martha. But not that Martha." Would not that have been weird if it were the same Martha? Indeed it would have been weird. Whoa yes.
7) The audience, which was estimated at about 600 from opening to close, was extremely polite and understanding, considering that many could not find a seat or place to stand in the room where the readings took place, and instead had to mill and mingle in one of the bar's other rooms. Those in the reading room were quiet and gracious and warm, and that was hugely appreciated by the readers -- Mr. Pollack, Mr. Bradford, Mr. Klam, and also Adrienne Miller (who was accompanied, via our clever bullying tactics, by the masterful Colleen Werthmann), Sarah Vowell, and John Hodgman, the evening's lovable and well-dressed emcee.

Now, because of the great success of the event and because we have finally found the appropriate venue for such goings-on, we will soon be inaugurating a more regular series of readings. Again, details will be forthcoming.

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Read McSweeney's News:
February 2000 | January 2000 | December 1999
November 1999 | October 1999 | September 1999
August 1999 | July 1999 | June 1999
May 1999 | April 1999 | March 1999

 

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