TL;DR — Too long; didn’t read

RS;TD — Read some; then deleted

SS;IC — Saw subject; ignored completely

TI;SS — Totally irrelevant; still sending

DR;ARA — Didn’t read; accidentally replied all

SU;SDR — Saw urgent; still didn’t read

DBJ;DF — Dirty boss joke; don’t forward

BL;SOP — Boss left; sexy office party

MM;H — Missed meeting; hungover

OV;SE — On vacation; stop emailing

SOV;SSE — Still on vacation; seriously stop emailing

WA;MC — Who ate; my cupcake

NP;WD — New phone; who dis

WR;GF — Won’t read; got fired

CR;LG — Can’t read; lost glasses

SDR;SW — Should definitely read; still won’t

RS;FO — Read subject; found offensive

NE;SOM — New employee; single or married

SR;LE — Saw rat; leaving early

CR;IL — Can’t reply; in labor

WI;MS — Where is; my stapler