Epitaphs from Oregon Trail After Some Eighth Grade Boys Had Used the Computer

Here lies Mattisgay, dead of cholera.

Here lies Cartman, dead of typhus.

Here lies BriansMomisHot, dead of measles.

Here lies ZOMBIES, dead of a snakebite.

Here lies MrBongWater, dead of exhaustion.

Here lies buttsex, dead of dysentery.