Send your list submissions to email@example.com.
Illustration by Francisco Baudizzone
[Originally published October 2, 2015.]
What is the name of your least favorite child?
In what year did you abandon your dreams?
What is the maiden name of your father’s mistress?
At what age did your childhood pet run away?
What was the name of your favorite unpaid internship?
In what city did you first experience ennui?
What is your ex-wife’s newest last name?
What sports team do you fetishize to avoid meaningful discussion with others?
What is the name of your favorite canceled TV show?
What was the middle name of your first rebound?
On what street did you lose your childlike sense of wonder?
When did you stop trying?
SUGGESTED READSNihilist Job Résumé
by Eric Feezell (4/3/2006)
List: Passwords Printed on the Eight Trial Software Packages AOL Has Mailed to Me since December 20, and an Imagined Exchange Between AOL and Me
by Matthew Summers-Sparks (4/10/2001)
Important Follow Up Re: The New Password Complexity Policy
by Scott Blaszak (5/1/2007)
RECENTLYPride and Prejudice and Trump
by Megan Quinn (9/28/2016)
Women Who Should Be Pretty Pissed Off: Eliza Hamilton Was Not Helpless
by Amy Watkin (9/28/2016)
List: The Ways People on Dateline “Had it All” According to the Family Cat
by Dan Rozier (9/28/2016)
POPULARIt’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
by Colin Nissan (9/22/2016)
Our Tiny Home is Revolutionizing How My Wife and I Fight
by Daniel Carrillo (9/21/2016)
An Honest Intern Application Cover Letter
by Nick Hughes (9/19/2016)