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Articles by
Cara Michelle Smith
Cara Michelle Smith is writer and journalist. You may be familiar with her work. Who knows? You can harass her on Twitter, so long as you do so creatively.
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December 2, 2020The Catholic Church Is Modernizing!
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November 17, 2020Welcome to Parler, the Social Media Platform for Conservative Free-Thinkers Who Reject Objective Reality
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October 16, 2020I Am the Undecided Voter
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March 17, 2020Alternatives to “Kiss Me, I’m Irish” During a Global Pandemic
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September 10, 2019Welcome to the New New Age
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July 16, 2019FAQ: Underage Women
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June 14, 2019Your Dad’s HBO Stand-Up Comedy Special
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June 10, 2019In Order to Be My Bridesmaid, You Must Complete This Scavenger Hunt
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May 17, 2019Babies Named After Game of Thrones Characters, All Grown Up
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April 2, 2019Choose Your Own Adventure: Talking to Your Dad About the 2020 Election
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October 31, 2018Why It’s Too Difficult For Me to Vote, and How Many Beers I Can Butt Chug In Under 60 Seconds
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August 24, 2018Your $6,000 Purebred Dog Comes With a Few Minor Quirks
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February 19, 2021I’m a Short Afternoon Walk and You’re Putting Way Too Much Pressure on Me
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February 22, 2021The UX on this Small Child Is Terrible
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February 24, 2021I Oppose the Democrats’ Plan to Lower Child Poverty. If Kids Want to Eat, They Should Work In Filthy Factories Like They Did in the Good Old Days
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February 16, 2021As a Superhero Teacher, I Can’t Wait to Sacrifice My Unvaccinated Life for Your Child
Recently
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February 26, 2021The Cure’s “Friday I’m in Love” for Nihilists
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February 26, 2021As a Staunch Defender of American Liberty, I Refuse to Let Trans People Infringe on My Rights as a White, Straight, Cisgender Congresswoman from Georgia
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February 26, 2021You’re Having a Bad Trip, Charlie Brown!
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February 25, 2021714 Epidemiologists on When We Can Resume Fixating on Petty Bullshit