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Articles by
Ilana Gordon
Ilana Gordon is a writer and comic currently living in Los Angeles. Follow her on Twitter. Do not follow her in real life.
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March 26, 2021The Four Questions, Modified for Another Passover in Quarantine
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June 22, 2020I’m the Guy Setting Off Fireworks Every Night In Your Neighborhood and I Have You Right Where I Want You
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May 8, 2020Your Mother Leads a Guided Meditation
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October 18, 2019Welcome to the Tenth Circle of Hell: The Dance Circle
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July 11, 2019Federal Sentencing Guidelines for Billionaires
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March 28, 2019Supervillains React to Betsy DeVos’s Proposal to Gut Funding For the Special Olympics
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March 14, 2019I Want a President I Can Drink a Beer With
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January 15, 2019It’s Time to Take Up Arms In the War Against Toxic Masculinity
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November 7, 2018Now That I’ve Finished Burning Down Your Village, It’s Time For Us to Come Together and Heal
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October 31, 2018Thank You For Participating In America’s Annual Voter Purge
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August 10, 2011Mary Poppins: A Job Review
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November 12, 2010An Open Letter to Pumpkin-Flavored Seasonal Treats
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January 5, 2022A Note of Reassurance from Your School District Regarding Our Updated Omicron Policies
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January 14, 2022What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You
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December 31, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
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January 7, 2022Here’s Why You’re Wrong for Supporting Either In-Person or Virtual School
Recently
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January 20, 2022We Are the Other Girls of Stars Hollow and We Deserve Recognition Too
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January 19, 2022I Drank from the Wrong Holy Grail and Now I’m an Adjunct Professor of Comparative Literature
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January 19, 2022Increasingly Convoluted Rules for Ordering a Philly Cheesesteak Like a Local
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January 19, 2022Tevye from Fiddler on the Roof, Now a Rich Man, Receives a Letter from His HOA