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Articles by
Janine Annett
Janine Annett lives in New York and is the author of I Am ‘Why Do I Need Venmo?’ Years Old. Her writing has also appeared in the New Yorker’s Daily Shouts, the New York Times, and other places.
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May 24, 2022A User Manual for Your New Home Alarm System, D.O.G.
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October 15, 2021FAQ About Your CSA
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July 30, 2021A Retelling of Snow White in Which It’s Clear That the Mirror Meant “Fair” as in “Very Pale”
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June 23, 2021I Am “Wearing Pajamas at 7 PM” Years Old
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June 10, 2021High Noon Sun Sips
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January 25, 2021Doctor, Please Help, I’m Feeling Optimistic
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September 10, 2020New “Days-of-the-Week” Shirts
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July 16, 2020Help, I Have a Sporty Kid
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July 14, 2020Mom Hair Through the Ages
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November 14, 2019Reviews of New Food: Tribe Dark Chocolate Hummus
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September 10, 2019I Am “Why Do I Need Venmo?” Years Old
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May 1, 2019Reviews of New Food: Orange Vanilla Coke Zero Sugar
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February 19, 2021I’m a Short Afternoon Walk and You’re Putting Way Too Much Pressure on Me
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June 28, 2022We Are an Anti-Abortion Couple, and Don’t Worry, We Will Adopt Your Baby
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January 14, 2022What Your Favorite Sad Dad Band Says About You
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June 27, 2022We Would Do Something, But Then We Wouldn’t Have the Power to Do Something, So We Can’t Do Something
Recently
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July 1, 2022FAQ: Freedom
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July 1, 2022A Declaration of Independence from the United States Supreme Court
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July 1, 2022Laws Should Be Based Solely on the Words of Constitutional Authors Like Me, the Guy Who Died After Shoving a Piece of Whalebone in His Dick
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June 30, 2022I’d Rather Drag Your Lifeless Body from This Party Than Wait Here While You Go to the Bathroom