Articles by
Kevin Shay
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May 26, 2005List: Upcoming and Much-Needed Thomas Frank Titles
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September 10, 2003McSweeney’s Brain Exploder: A Name-Tag Snafu at the Annual Spice Girls/ Smurfs/ Seven Dwarfs Convention
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August 20, 2001One Morning, At The Office
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November 23, 2000The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and The Twelve Steps of Creating a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade Balloon (as Listed on the MacyParade.com Web Site), Head to Head
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October 24, 2000List: Searching for Orthographical Consensus by Counting Search Results on Google.com, Part One: The Leader of Libya
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June 14, 2000Pirate Riddles for Sophisticates
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March 14, 2000My Dogme95 Confession
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January 17, 2000List: Percentages of Internet Users Genuinely Engaged in the Action in Column “A” While Typing the Abbreviation in Column “B.”
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January 10, 2000List: Terms That Corporate America Should Consider Using in Place of “Going Forward.”
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December 3, 1999Hypothetical Transcript of the Discussion Leading to the Decision to Euthanize Hsing-Hsing the Giant Panda
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September 24, 1999Fake Memo about Superman’s Vision.
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July 14, 1999Plath or Gabrielle?
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April 4, 2018Fifty-Six Questions for Young MC Upon Hearing “Bust a Move” for the First Time in Twenty-Two Years
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April 10, 2018List: Horoscopes for Librarians
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March 19, 2018I’m Going to Close This Deal Using Business Words I’ve Heard Men Yell in Airports
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April 6, 2018We Deeply Regret Hiring the Perpetrators of the Salem Witch Trials as Opinion Columnists
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April 18, 2018The First Female President
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April 18, 2018List: Who Said It: Middle-Aged Woman or Teenage Boy?
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April 18, 2018My Commute and Workday as Described By Ancient Poets
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April 17, 2018List: 17 Words and Phrases You Can’t Spell without “Sean Hannity,” “Michael Cohen,” and “Donald Trump” Arranged in the Shape of a Small Phallus