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Articles by
Lucas Gardner
Lucas Gardner is a comedy writer in Queens, NY. He recently worked as a writer on the forthcoming TBS series “Miracle Workers.” He is the author of the comic novels Quietly, From Afar… (2015) and Contemptible Blue (2017). More of his work can be found at www.LucasGardnersThings.com.
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September 16, 2020How the Pandemic Has Affected the Production of My College Sex-Comedy, Sex University
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May 8, 2020Good News! Wait, Never Mind
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February 4, 202016 Tricks to Stretch Out an Essay
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October 15, 2018Please Purchase My Personal Data From Me Directly
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November 4, 2015I Can’t Believe I’m Going to Die On This Kid Rock Cruise
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October 1, 2015As Your Mayor, I Promise I’m Going to Find a Way Out of This Well
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May 21, 2015Print Lovers Magazine is Going Digital!
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April 6, 2015Our Men’s Rights Activism Group Refuses to Share This Meeting Space
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January 26, 2015Please Greenlight My Television Show About Several Young White People Trying to Make it In the Big City
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November 24, 2014Now That It’s Almost December, It’s Time to Turn This Secret Sex Club Back Into a Christmas Tree Store
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September 10, 2014Please Steal My Vespa
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May 5, 2014Did You Download 250 GBs of Music by the Crash Test Dummies?
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September 3, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-889
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September 22, 2020It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 14, 2020I Appreciate Your Concern, But Our Enormous Wedding Was Socially Distanced
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September 14, 2020I Like My Men Like I Like My… (2020 Edition)
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September 25, 2020Unfortunately, We Will Not Be Pausing the Apocalypse for Election Day
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September 25, 2020The New Bill & Ted Movie Is More Chilling for What It Doesn’t Say About Trump Than What It Does
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September 24, 2020Editorial Template For Every Time a Grand Jury Acquits a Police Officer