NEW E-BOOK ALERT!
From now until December 31st, become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron and receive a Patreon-exclusive e-book, KEEP ON SCROLLIN’ DON’T STOP, the bonus companion to our print collection, KEEP SCROLLING TILL YOU FEEL SOMETHING. A pledge of $3 (or more) per month is all it takes. Click here to become a patron today!
Ryan Ciecwisz is a comedian and writer living in New Jersey. His Lyft rating is 4.97.