Our 21 Most-Read Articles of 2021

 

We’re counting down our most-read pieces of 2021. The list will be updated as often as our weary and unfashionably attired editor can cobble the links together. Thanks to all our contributors and readers this year!

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21. JOB POSTING: ASSISTANT PROFESSOR OF ROBOTICS AND ANIMAL HUSBANDRY WITH A SPECIALIZATION IN DANCE
by Kate Brennan

20. HELLO, WE USED TO KNOW EACH OTHER AND NOW I’M A TOXIC PRESENCE ON YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA FEEDS
by TJ Dawe

19. WAKE UP, SAILORS, SCURVY IS A HOAX
by Kathryn Baecht

18. GOOD PARENTS CAPITALIZE ON THEIR INDIVIDUAL STRENGTHS. MY WIFE’S IS SEEING TO OUR KIDS’ EVERY NEED, AND MINE IS ROUGHHOUSING
by Ryan C. Martin

17. I AM A DISAPPOINTED BIDEN VOTER WHO WAS TOLD HE’D IMMEDIATELY IMPLEMENT COMMUNIST RULE
by Chandler Dean

16. HOW I SAVED ENOUGH TO BUY A HOUSE WITH MY PARENTS’ MONEY
by Eli Grober

15. AN FAQ ABOUT YOUR NEW BIRTH CONTROL: THE MUSIC OF RUSH
by Leslie Ylinen

14. A JEOPARDY! BOARD FOR DETERMINING WHO SHOULD BE THE NEXT HOST OF JEOPARDY!
by Carlos Greaves

13. WITH GOD AS MY WITNESS, I WILL NOT PICK THE RESTAURANT
by Joanna Borns

12. THIS IS YOUR KID’S SCHOOL AND EVEN THOUGH THE EMERGENCY CONTACT FORM LISTS YOUR HUSBAND, WE NEED YOU, THE MOM
by Kristin W. Vogan

11. A SHORT QUIZ FOR MY STUDENTS IN LIEU OF ASKING ABOUT THEIR VACCINE STATUS OR REQUESTING THAT THEY WEAR MASKS
by Victor Ray

10. WHAT YOUR FAVORITE ’90S ROCK BAND SAYS ABOUT THE TYPE OF BORED SUBURBAN DAD YOU ARE TODAY
by Jared Bilski and Talia Argondezzi

9. FAQ FOR RUSHING DELTA DELTA VARIANT
by Sara K. Runnels

8. THE UX ON THIS SMALL CHILD IS TERRIBLE
by Leslie Ylinen

7. I AM THE DESIGNER OF THIS RESTAURANT’S OUTDOOR SEATING SPACE, AND THIS IS MY ARTIST’S STATEMENT
by Simon Henriques

6. THE TERRIBLE THINGS I HAVE SAID AND DONE MY ENTIRE LIFE, AND RIGHT UP UNTIL A FEW DAYS AGO, DO NOT REPRESENT ME AS A PERSON
by Eli Grober

5. VACCINE SIDE EFFECT, OR HAVE YOU JUST BEEN ALIVE FOR 40 YEARS?
by Talia Argondezzi

4. I’M A SHORT AFTERNOON WALK AND YOU’RE PUTTING WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME
by Emily Delaney

3. A TYPICAL FRIDAY IN OREGON, AS IMAGINED BY MY EAST COAST FRIENDS
by Gracie Beaver-Kairis

2. ARE YOU ALLOWED TO CRITICIZE SIMONE BILES?: A DECISION TREE
by Carlos Greaves

1. OH MY FUCKING GOD, GET THE FUCKING VACCINE ALREADY, YOU FUCKING FUCKS
by Wendy Molyneux