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All posts tagged
thomas-jefferson
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February 19, 2018Thomas Jefferson Asks for an Extension
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December 2, 2016If I Had to Make Out With the Founding Fathers Because Gary Sinise Was Threatening Me With a Gun, This is the Order I’d Go In
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January 26, 2012Non-Essential Mnemonics: “People say President Jefferson had nineteen different mistresses. Dude, Jefferson had Chlamydia—no doubt.”
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July 5, 2011Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: How Do I Make a President?
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March 4, 2011Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: When Did Things Get So Mean?
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July 27, 2010Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: Can the President Take the Week Off?
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May 19, 2010Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: How Close Can I Get?
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May 7, 2010An Open Letter to the Gentleman Who Gave Us a Tour of Monticello
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January 6, 2010Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: What Did the Founding Fathers Smell Like?
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October 22, 2009Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents: Was Thomas Jefferson a Jerk?
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April 30, 2020The Girl From Avril Lavigne’s “Sk8er Boi” Responds 18 Years Later
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June 26, 2020A Message from Your University’s Vice President for Magical Thinking
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June 24, 2020Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-759
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June 22, 2020I’m the Guy Setting Off Fireworks Every Night In Your Neighborhood and I Have You Right Where I Want You
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July 3, 2020The Fourth of July: Myth vs. Fact
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July 3, 2020We Apologize That Instead of July Fourth Bunting, We Accidentally Shipped You a Box Full of Snakes
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July 3, 2020
Of Plague and Plenty -
July 3, 2020It’s Time to Sign the Declaration of Independence, and I, Elbridge Gerry, Will Have the Biggest Signature of All