Alice Walker Meets Roy G. Biv.
I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.
He gets put out if you walk by the color red, too. Doesn’t necessarily have to be in a field. Could be anywhere.
If you walk by orange? Like, at HoJo’s? He gets irked. No, wait—more like nettled. He’ll be peevish, I guarantee that.
Yellow, you better be like, “Oh, wow, yellow,” or He’ll get all cranky with you.
Don’t go ignoring green, whatever you do. Man, does He get hot under the collar if you ignore green.
Blue? Choleric, I swear.
Overlook indigo and He goes right through the roof. I mean it, He’ll rip the top of your head right off.
If you walk by the color violet, He goes fucking ballistic.
SUGGESTED READSAnecdotes About the Authors I’ve Met
by Kevin Sampsell (11/1/2000)
Interview With A Twenty First Century Author About Subjects Related To Twenty First Century Literature
by Paul Maliszewski (1/24/2001)
List: Authors Whose Names You Can Say While Chewing Gum
by Paul Bacon (9/25/2000)
RECENTLYStop Pushing My Buttons
by Jon Methven (4/1/2015)
Your Prescribing Doctor: Dispatches from the Psycho-pharmaceutical Complex: Der Sturm und Drang: Adolescence and Adulthood (Zoloft, Prozac, Celexa, Xanax, Wellbutrin, Klonopin)
by Rebekah Frumkin (4/1/2015)
List: Recent Hit Pop Songs Co-Written by Influential Feminist Philosophers
by Joyce Miller (4/1/2015)
POPULARAn Honest College Rejection Letter
by Mimi Evans (3/26/2015)
List: What Your Favorite ’80s Band Says About You
by John Peck (7/5/2011)
Reasons You Were Not Promoted That are Totally Unrelated to Gender
by Homa Mojtabai (1/27/2015)