Daily humor
almost every day
since 1998.
almost every day
since 1998.
AWARDS!
McSweeney’s Quarterly is a finalist for the 2020 National Magazine Award for Fiction!
Our Latest Post
-
Waiting for Dodo: Conversations With My Baby About His Refusal to Sleep Comprised Entirely of Quotes From Waiting For Godot
BABY: What do we do now?
ME: I don’t know.
BABY: Let’s go.
ME: We can’t.
BABY: Why not?
ME: We’re waiting for Dodo. -
Lists
Famous Quotes From Philosophers If They Had Spent $9 for a Bottle of Juice
“The only thing I know is that I know nothing. And that’s why it’s okay that I didn’t check the price on this juice before sliding it across the counter, and then felt too paralyzed from embarrassment to say that I didn’t want it when I found out it was $9.” — Socrates -
I Hate Trump’s Awful Policies, But I Love That He’s a Huge Asshole
“At the end of the day, no matter your political persuasion, you just want a president who has the two main ingredients of a great leader: being a petty twat with no real friends.” -
Aww, Our Newborn Baby Is So Beautiful… Right?
“I definitely don’t find anything off-putting about her conic head. It’s perfect.” -
Lists
Jokes I’ve Told That My Male Colleagues Didn’t Like
“What’s short, sloppy, and full of periods? Men’s emails.”
Trending
-
February 19, 2020Self-Care Tips for Toddlers
-
February 21, 2020Jokes I’ve Told That My Male Colleagues Didn’t Like
-
February 12, 2020Who Said It: Mike Bloomberg or Lucille Bluth?
-
February 12, 2016The Pagan Origins of Valentine’s Day
-
November 20, 2019I Am a Trader Joe’s Parking Lot and I Am Here to Destroy You
-
January 24, 2020Why I Decided Not to Have an OBGYN and Let Wendy From Work Handle My Prenatal Care Instead
Over at McSweeney's Publishing
-
February 10, 2020
Excerpts from McSweeney’s Quarterly: The Woman In the Closet -
February 10, 2020
Excerpts from McSweeney’s Quarterly: Ghost Lover -
January 7, 2020McSweeney’s Announces New Reproductive Freedom Anthology Edited by Shelly Oria
-
November 19, 2019
McSweeney’s Books: An Interview With Three Contributors to the New Book Unnecessarily Beautiful Spaces for Young Minds On Fire -
November 12, 2019
A Letter From Our Executive Director -
November 8, 2019
McSweeney’s Books: “We Should Have Closed Up Shop Back In ’09 After We Helped Cure Bird Flu”: The Editors’ Note From Keep Scrolling Till You Feel Something -
November 7, 2019
Excerpts from McSweeney’s Quarterly: Shouting Wenkie
Over in the Store
-
All subscriptions placed before March 1st will begin with Black Imagination After years of of popular demand from the clamoring masses, we are at last revamping and relaunching our McSweeney's... -
McSweeney's is ecstatic to announce that we've been nominated for the 2020 National Magazine Award for fiction. In celebration of this incredible news, we've put together a special bundle just for... -
Subscribe to our National Magazine Award-winning, somewhat accurately named, McSweeney’s Quarterly today. -
"This is not a book to simply read in total and digest--yes, do that--but it is also a work to return to in parts whenever necessary. It's a book to ingest like medicine."
—Rion Scott
Recent Posts
-
February 21, 2020Strap In, Folks, Because a Jazz Band Is Setting Up In This Coffee Shop
-
February 20, 2020Maura Quint’s Presidential Debate Recaps: The One With Mike Bloomberg
-
February 20, 2020A Children’s Librarian Blurbs Adult Literary and Commercial Fiction
-
February 20, 2020Abbott and Costello’s “Who’s Running In the Democratic Primary?”
-
February 19, 2020Self-Care Tips for Toddlers
Please engage with our brand on social media.
Or you may contact our customer service representative. She is a friendly human person.
- Email Us
- (415) 642-5609
- 849 Valencia St.
SF, CA 94110
Looking for submissions?
Right this way…
Right this way…
