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Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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November 17, 2021I’m Captain Ahab and I Say We Must Never Transition Away from a Whale-Based Energy Industry
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November 9, 2021I Am Godzilla, King of Monsters, and I, Too, Had a Brief Relationship with Pete Davidson
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November 3, 2021It Is I, William Shakespeare, and I Am Begging You to Stop Letting High Schoolers Put on Productions of Macbeth
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November 1, 2021An Afternoon with Me, the Man in an REI Print Ad
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October 20, 2021It Would Be Un-American to Support Legislation That Doesn’t Directly Benefit Me
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October 15, 2021Scooby-Doo Refuses to Get the Rabies Vaccine
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October 4, 2021Hello, We Used to Know Each Other and Now I’m a Toxic Presence on Your Social Media Feeds
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September 13, 2021Miss Trunchbull Asks That You Reconsider Her Methods, Post-Pandemic
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August 13, 2021I’m the Old Lady from Titanic and Let Me Just Tell You Those Nudes Will Leak
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August 12, 2021Oedipus Learns of the Term “Oedipus Complex”
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August 3, 2021I Am a Female Character in a Fantasy Movie, and It Is Integral to the Plot That I Be Topless
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July 27, 2021I’m the Guy Who Wears Jeans in the Summer, and You’ll Never Get Me to Admit That I’m Burning Up
Trending 🔥
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September 2, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
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November 23, 2021Post-Dinner Interview with a Twelve-Year-Old Who Sat at the Grown-Ups’ Table for the First Time on Thanksgiving
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November 18, 2021Draco Malfoy’s College Recommendation Letter That I Totally Don’t Feel Conflicted About Writing Whatsoever
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November 10, 2021I’m Confused Why All These People Are Quitting Jobs That Pay No Money and Make Them Want to Die