McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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February 21, 2019Monologue: Hi, I’m an Empath Now
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February 7, 2019Monologue: I’m a Woman in a Nonfat Yogurt Commercial
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January 30, 2019Monologue: I Am a Stryker-X Assault Backpack, and This Airport Lounge Is an Insult
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January 9, 2019Monologue: Sally Sells Seashells By the Seashore Because the Government Is Shut Down and She Isn’t Getting a Paycheck
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December 17, 2018Monologue: Just Let Me Have a Robust Debate With Your Adolescent Son
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December 12, 2018Monologue: I’m The World’s Best Dad Because Once I Watched My Kid When My Wife Wasn’t Around
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December 5, 2018Monologue: Hi, It’s Me, the Girlfriend of a Marvel Superhero Trying to Return this Used Car
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November 30, 2018Monologue: I’m Hanukkah and I’m Living My Best Life So Deal With It
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November 29, 2018Monologue: I Am a Liberal Comedian and I Am Ready to Perform Ally-Ship By Calling Conservatives Gay Every Chance I Get
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October 24, 2018Monologue: I’m Your Spaghetti Strap Sports Bra, and I’m Here to Sabotage Your High-Impact Workout
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October 22, 2018Monologue: Hi, I’m the Lone Woman of Color in Your Book Club
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October 8, 2018Monologue: I’m the Tech Venture Capitalist Giving You the Freedom to Barely Scrape By
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February 21, 2019We’re Parents of Young Children and We Binge-Watch TV Minutes at a Time
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February 21, 2019List: Improv Comedy Rules for Pessimists
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February 21, 2019Monologue: Hi, I’m an Empath Now
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February 20, 2019Despite 45 Male and Predominantly White U.S. Presidents In a Row, It Is a Terrible Idea to Prefer a Candidate Based On Their Gender or Race