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Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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January 15, 2021Even I, Satan, Am Appalled at the State of the Republican Party
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January 14, 2021I Am the Designer of This Restaurant’s Outdoor Seating Space, and This Is My Artist’s Statement
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January 11, 2021I’m 15th-Century Aztec King Ahuitzotl and I’m Kind of Uncomfortable with All the Human Sacrificing Going on Around Here
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January 8, 2021Dry January Is Shocked By Your Naïveté
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January 7, 2021I’m the 25th Amendment, and I’ve Been Waiting for This Moment My Entire Life
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January 6, 2021“You Fuckers Really Screwed This Up”: A Message from James Madison on the 2020 Electoral Count
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January 5, 2021Hi Teachers, It’s Me, the Google Classroom Private Comment Function, and I’m Here to Save the Day
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December 23, 2020Timothy Cratchit’s Socialist Manifesto
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December 21, 2020I’m Kris Kringle from the 1970 TV Movie Santa Claus Is Comin’ to Town and It Is Time to Let Me Die
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December 16, 2020The Cashier from “The Christmas Shoes” Breaks His Silence
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December 8, 2020Think 2020 Has Been Long for You? I’m the Kid from Tuck Everlasting, and It’s Literally Been Forever for Me
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December 7, 2020I Am the Facebook Algorithm and I Come to You Now, Requesting a Swift and Merciful Death
Trending 🔥
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January 15, 2021
Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing (So Far): Atrocities 1-1,053 -
January 14, 2021I Am the Designer of This Restaurant’s Outdoor Seating Space, and This Is My Artist’s Statement
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January 13, 2021Excerpts from the Sex and the City Revival in Which Samantha Is Replaced with Fran Lebowitz
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December 21, 2020Things I Didn’t Have on My 2020 Bingo Card Bingo
Recently
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January 19, 2021If We Raise the Minimum Wage, What Will Happen to My Gruel Business?
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January 19, 2021As a White Man, I Say Separate the Art from the Artist
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January 19, 2021It’s My Last Day in Office and I’m Pardoning Everyone
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January 18, 2021Fake MLK Quotes Your Stepdad Gary Posted to Prove He’s Definitely Not a Racist