The Believer has returned
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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July 17, 2023I Am a Monster Hell Bent on Destroying Earth, but Humans Are More Concerned That I’m a Lesbian
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June 8, 2023Carrie Bradshaw Reflects on the Smoke from the Canadian Wildfires
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May 30, 2023I’m the Epigraph to the Novel You’re Reading, and I Don’t Know Why I’m Here Either
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May 16, 2023I’m the Person Who Designs Open-Plan Office Spaces, Despite Never Having Actually Worked in One
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May 15, 2023I Will Defend Free Speech to the Death. Or Until an Autocrat Asks Me to Stop
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May 4, 2023Why God Decided Dogs Can’t Live as Long as People
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May 3, 2023If Elected President, I Promise to Slaughter Mickey Mouse
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April 26, 2023Inside the Mind of an AI-Generated Woman Laughing Alone with Salad
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April 19, 2023I’m Just a Typical British Man
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April 17, 2023I’m ChatGPT, and for the Love of God, Please Don’t Make Me Do Any More Copywriting
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April 7, 2023I Am Noah and I Need to Look at Your Animals’ Pee-Pees
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March 24, 2023The Wedding Vows of Someone Marrying Their “Best Friend”
Trending 🔥
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September 22, 2023It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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September 15, 2023Son, You’re Old Enough to Know the Truth, There is No Such Thing as the “Invisible Hand of the Market”
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September 22, 2023Welcome to Rosalita’s Boarding House for Girls and Women Rescued by Bruce Springsteen from Dead-End Small Towns
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September 18, 2023Who Made This Hummus?