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Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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December 1, 2020I’m the 4:30 PM Sunset and I’d Like to Clarify a Few Things
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November 20, 2020The 2020 Rockefeller Center Tree Speaks
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November 13, 2020I Am Belphegor, the Demon of Sloth, and I Think It’s Time for Trump to Concede the Election
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October 30, 2020I’m Your Dead Movie Wife and I Have Some Questions
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October 29, 2020We Are Random Capitalizations, Words in ALL CAPS, and Incorrect Punctuation and We Endorse Joe Biden for President
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October 22, 2020To the Enemies Surrounding Our Castle, Please Understand That I Often Privately Disagreed With Macbeth’s Policies
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October 20, 2020The Woman From Tom Petty’s “Free Fallin’” Would Like to Clear a Few Things Up
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October 16, 2020I Am the Undecided Voter
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October 15, 2020I Am the Mayor from Jaws, and I Am Begging You to Stop Comparing Me to Donald Trump
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October 13, 2020I’m a Principled Republican Senator and I’m Suddenly Troubled By the Current State of Politics
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October 13, 2020I’m a Conservative Feminist, and I Believe You Should Pull Yourself Up By Your Bootstraps and Open That Jar Yourself
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September 25, 2020We Are the 56 Tubs of Clorox Wipes You Bought At the Start of the Pandemic
Trending 🔥
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December 21, 2020Things I Didn’t Have on My 2020 Bingo Card Bingo
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January 11, 2021Grendel Should Not Have Rampaged Through Our Capitol, But Slaying Him Will Only Further Divide Our Clans
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January 4, 2021Here’s How Time Works In 2021
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January 13, 2021Excerpts from the Sex and the City Revival in Which Samantha Is Replaced with Fran Lebowitz