McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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September 14, 2017Monologue: I’m a Male Author Photo, Hear Me Brood
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September 11, 2017Monologue: I Am a Successful YouTube Video Game Streamer and I Believe Racial Slurs Are Essential to Gaming
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August 31, 2017Monologue: When It Comes to Tech Meetups, I’m a Three-a-Day Guy
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August 18, 2017Monologue: I’m Ivanka Trump, and I Cannot Believe You Fucking Morons Keep Falling for My Bullshit
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August 14, 2017Monologue: President Trump’s Statement Following the Events in The Sound of Music
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August 10, 2017Monologue: I’m a Teenager in High School as Portrayed By an Adult Woman On TV
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August 5, 2017Monologue: I Love This Morbidly Obese Comedian and His Curvy Body
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July 29, 2017Monologue: Top Gun’s Maverick Addresses the Application of the Term “Maverick” to Senator John McCain
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July 25, 2017Monologue: I Am a New Meme
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July 12, 2017Monologue: I Am Trump’s Lawyer’s Lawyer’s Lawyer’s Lawyer and Would Someone Please Tell Me What the Fuck I Am Supposed to Be Doing?
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July 5, 2017Monologue: I Don’t Care Who You Are or What Color Your Skin Is, I Will Do Anything to Make Sure You Get Your Health Care Denied
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June 30, 2017Monologue: I’m a Busy Mom and I Have One Simple Question for All Americans on This Fourth of July
Trending 🔥
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October 20, 2009It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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October 10, 2018My Common App Essay: “Every School Reading This Except Dartmouth Sucks Ass”
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October 8, 2018Matreon: The Patreon Platform for Emotional Labor
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October 12, 2018I Am Sick and Tired of Constantly Being Bullied for My Extreme Wealth and Political Power